moodless...

am real tired today... couldn't wake up this morning... got class ar... missions and evans.. but anyways, aint gonna be too depressing a blog entry since i'm feeling better... juz needed to blog before i start on my work...

so... it's not true that all ur problems are gone after the exams.... i have lots of work to catch up on now... suppose to finish ALL of it on friday but it was impossible... no choice i brought miss lee's notes and everything home to copy... which i noe i'd most probably get a scolding, but i deserve it la... always not doing my work.... but i know tt i'll finish it somehow through God's grace... somehow, sometime soon...

once again, i have lots of things to think about... nothing much nothing important juz some things tt needs giving some thought to... haha... tak rindu macam mana though, if u guys were wondering ha...

really wanted to go for dinner with the rest after service... really wanted to hang out with em a while more... as usual, i did not want to go home... i mean like, it's juz me not to go home early and do my work, like i even care about my work right. but i guess, i have to set my priorities right... it's about time i "wake up my idea" ( like how miss lee would say it.. ) and start putting what's more important first. i mean it's like 1 more week before i get too see em and hang out and all... dunnoe la... haiyo....

on my way home, i juz kinda have juz enough time to think about everything, juz "talking" to myself in my head.. ha... yea.. haha... at times, like in my lesson on relationship today, i do feel empty.. i feel like something's missing. i totally understand what it meant and how it feels... i know there are many of u out there too who feels lonely, u juz need something to fill it. so probably a girlfriend? ya, i guess tt's when we often do ya? but Jesus is here to fill up that emptiness, He loves us when or if nobody does... ya.... me, i do feel tt feeling once in a while these days.. ha... it's true i do miss loving someone... been a long time since me and ec went our seperate ways, i do feel tt emptiness too.. sometimes, i juz totally forgot about God haha... my imperfectness and i turn to my friends... but when i turn to Jesus, i do see and feel a change in my life and i'm constantly reminding myself to turn to Him whenever i'm lonely... or feeling empty...

maybe yesterday i a bit miserable cos aku really tak nak rindu macam mana pergi... hahahaha... but ya.. once the rest of the SCs arrived, i had lots of fun ya... i din feel sad, left out or anything, in fact i was juz talking and telling them about Jesus... was real cool.. haha.. helpin me practice my future speeches tt i'm gonna make!!! hahaha...

it's pain being alone, but the feeling of being alone juz comforts me... haha.. i'm wierd ya... i guess, it does make me sad but i feel comforted some how.. like nothing's there with me to bother me.. ha.. my selfish thoughts of being alone again.. haha... guess only some of u noe about tt thought... the thought of how i'd live alone in this world haha.. and when i thought it was too lonely, i added a partner into my "dream" hahaha...

anyways, as i reached the LRT, i met the solomon island team again, and so, i did not feel lonely or wad. by the time i reach home, i juz felt great i guess it's cos i was interacting with God again.. was praying for them in the LRT... sooo.. ya... i guess how i feel today is more or less covered in this entry...