Thank you miss Chan!!!

ha!! now i can finally blog.. actually i was not planning to blog cos i had nothing to say. i was doing my stupid exercise of containing anger again. seriously i noe i was rude to tee wei on tt hand shake and i'm sorry. i was angry at that point of time and i din want to show cos i was getting ready to go back to my old self. cos i wanted to be violent so tt i wont be bullied. the only way, store anger and release. did tt during my pri and sec school days. but now, i dun care if u guys look down on me cos i cry easily or what. me crying is a gift from God to help release my anger. instead of being rude and violent and get hated, i juz cry.

but thanks to miss chan, i did not go back to my old self. man.. i was juz sooo angry juz now, all the way home. i din open my mouth, i din tear, i din want to blog, i juz stare into blank space and think of tml's training and focus on playing hard and rough! i was juz ready to hit soo hard, no body will even touch me on time. i was damn mad and angry. but because of miss chan, i manage to release tt anger.

i found miss chan's blog. realise that her nick she used was sooo familiar. went back to my older entries to look for her comments to see if it was really her. and it was her! as i read her comments, i became curious about what i blogged last time, so i read the entry as well... it's mostly about esther and lilo. and as i read them, this tear juz came out. and i totally snapped out of my damn stupid anger containing thingy. thanks miss chan.... i nearly ruined my own life...

man..i would juz show no respect to anyone tml if i continue containing my anger. i'd be back to the lone ranger days only some of u noe of. i am juz glad that tt tear came out. it totally relieved me of everything. i dunnoe what i was thinking man. pple love me for who i am. why did i want to change!? ha! but i was really disappointed with my friends. though i am the one to be blamed i guess... i juz realise tt it is really hard to tell ur probs to anyone too.. not only the issue on trust. there's no point. i have to face the fact tt if i'm no where part of them. dun try to be one. cos u'll end up more hurt. cos u are not part of them.

now i feel soooo much better blogging and all... i dun care what u guys think about me. i definitely dun want to write these things everyday. i want to stop after the new fresh start thingy. so i'll juz forget about all the shit u guys have done to me or put me through. i'm not blaming u pple too. cos i'm the lame shit and i dun need to betray my friends (or should i say sell them out) in order to make the pack. whoever this person is, u are not a person who treasures friendship. so friends of such pple, u should becareful too.