10/05/07

HAHAHA go type shellscrape in yahoo and u'll find a lot of pple complaining about how painful it is to dig it, how this grave u dug for urself will become ur home for the next few nights hahahaha!!!

well.. i just returned from field camp, fell ill again. this is really frustrating, i need to stop falling sick.

neways, it's been tough, cos i've really been pushing myself. surprisingly, at 39.1 degrees, i dun feel a bit sick when digging my shellscrape but as i take a break, i begin to feel feverish, and so i'd continue digging.

until i couldn't take it, i finally reported my fever, i was afraid my brain would fry hahahaha... this is an example of mind over body, like what the medic was telling another geng recruit haha.. he said "this guy mind fit but body unfit, you, body fit but mind, unfit." seriously man, i think my endurance has really increased.

also, i've learnt something more about ns. it's on purpose that some of our trainings are set on the weekends. it's so tt while our friends are having fun, we are training, to show them that as soldiers, we are willing to sacrifice our time to serve.

part of being mentally fit is to control ur emotions. the army wants you to seperate from your friends, to leave them behind, because they cause you to be weak. you cant train feeling depressed all the time, if all you think about is to get out and spend time with them.

part of being a soldier is solitude. i too can't believe it when they explained. it's just so wrong. but i find it true. now, i do not really think about what pple are doing nor do i need to msg my friends as much as before. even that kind of love, i dunnoe, it feels different. it hurts initially, but now that feeling's numb.

dun bother to love cos there's almost no room for it.

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haha dun get me wrong, of course i am still glad to see everyone and will still sms u all when i need to ya.