17/10/10

i finally came up with the perfect phrase.

it feels like vfc youths are becoming like city harvest.

individual growth vs church growth. focus on one and you compromise the other.

good or bad, u decide.

06/10/10

Hi there old friend. i thought i wouldn't need you anymore. but i really need to rant. i cant tell my best friend cos she wont understand how i feel. i cant tell my sch mates cos they think i'm bragging. i cant tell anyone cos they just think i'm retarded.

2 types of people. either they say wow you've done well, (which i dont find it entirely true. and it dont help make me feel better complimenting me) or they focus only on the B and the other distinctions are negligible.

i want to change my mentality towards it. i thought i have gotten over it. but i just keep getting reminded of it everyday, everywhere i go by everyone.

i told myself, it's not going to be the B that ruined me, but the B that changed me

yet it seems easier said then done.

04/10/10

They will never go "Wah! 5 distinctions! well done!"
It's always "Why did you get a B? is it just you or everybody else?"

why bother what other people get. it's comparison that causes us to be in a situation of "you're ok, i'm not ok."
-

disappointments aside. well, i dont live or do well for anyone.

these hols have been really meaningful especially with the scholars induction camp. it felt as if i was at some christian seminar. felt God speaking to me in so many ways. found out on the last day, most of the staff were christians. wow.

i guess God had a purpose for "forcing" me to go for it. ha...

greater purity, greater influence.