continued...(saturday)

eh... oh ya... i think hor... teck way that thing happened on saturday.. or was it friday?? haha i really forgot liaoz. but anyway, let's continue with the story...

Saturday...
hmmm... saturday morning, i could not wake up haha.... i think if i remembered correctly, i msged them telling them tt i want to sleep a while longer and tt i'll meet em there. oh ya! stupid zhida got bball comp den left me only guy there!! ar!!! haha... nvm i can handle... (like real)

ok. saturday was suppose to be the day of judging haha.. we all worked hard to keep our stall moving. i remember tt the girls had to leave me alone cos they wanted to go for the judging on best desision making. but lose la. minus 5 out of 9 points cos they make wrong decision. but again, i dun blame them.. juz say them hahahahahahaha!

so.. i cant remember much but i recalled that when the girls left for judging, i met two ladies and guided them to my stall convinced them to buy and offered a slightly lower price cos they were gonna buy in bulk. haha.. cool. so i attended to them.. then uddenly, another lady came and have a look. i placed the bookmark on her hand then the son saw and he wanted den bo pian. she also buy den i like half way helping the 2 ladies take out stock, at the same time i had to look for the bookmark the mother and son wanted. den i greedy. saw two more ladies walk by i left my other customers alone and go talk to them. they like it den started choosing. at that same time, that lil boy with the mother, kept messing the table!! den i still trying to find the keychains for the first 2 ladies. den one auntie came, she liked our pendant so i faster say some stuff make it value added so that she will confirm buy ma... haha... den i say a lil den she like ok buy. den i have to packet for her. den i went back to those buying bookmarks until i cannot ta han!!! typing this also sooo difficult! so i asked teck way help me though he not part of my group. so he did. heng ar! den after i juz sold the set of necklaces, the girls came back... ah... den got pple help me le.

in juz 10mins of the girls disappearance, i made a total sales of more than $50 already, the neclace, $20 and another lady buy set $33 i give a bit discount. more den $50 liaoz.. still got those bookmarks i sold haha.. power ar!! haha... den the best part was when the judge came, i din have time to talk to him. until it was like all clear den he come back hahahaha...

ok back to teck way. forgot to tell u guys... the day after the quarrel which is saturday, he did nothing. juz sit behind both our stalls listen music. dun want to talk nor help jia li they all. so when i kinda asked him to help and he did, jia li they all not happy with him cos he help me haha....

anyway, esther visited me again but this time, she came with kelvin. haha.. cos wad happened is tt kelvin saw her and recognise her cos i showed him her photo before. so he told me he use kai method "xiao jie ni hao" haha.... so esther kinda brought me shepherd pie(heh.. dunnoe how to spell...) quite nice ar... if u reading this ster, make more for me can??? heee... =D

so... lemme think wad else happened on saturday.... hmmm... oh ya! i got to noe the name of the girl who look like michelle. her name's emily tan haha... i got to noe the name cos those malay friends whom i made,(syazana, hady, shuiey, minachi) tell me haha... they noe cos i told them about michelle and her. den i think zhida leak here and there la... i forgot also. haha... den joshua's bro (lasyt time from vfc) went down. den i recongnise him so i also told him about those 2 girls looking alike.. actually got show em the photo la... dun wan to say cos sure ask where i got the photos right haha.. for me to noe and for u to find out. and pple dun pao toh hor!

soo... those yusof ishak friends i made there quite close with yishun sec one cos their stalls all together haha... so sometimes when i go chat with prasad(yishun sec, different stall from emily) and hady they all, sometimes emily(from yishun sec) would juz join so get to chat with her a lil la.

saturday night, was the night me and the yusof ishak sec become like brothers and sisters. haha.. we were like quite close la... i like abandon our school pple go join them... i feel a lil out of place cos i the oldest ar. haha... so i juz like play along with em.. do silly things like small boy. but i enjoyed myself ar.. haha.. fun.

so went home with them till they dropped off at bukit batok den went with jia li and teck way to cck den we go our separate ways.... so i guess that's all for saturday....

to be continued.... once again....

4 stories of 4 days.. (friday)

argh!!! i juz typ finished juz now took me so long and my damn comp hang!!! ARGH!!! muz retype le... wah.. juz now story so nice... now dunnoe got the mood to retype the same way but here goes...

Friday..
ok so i had to wake up real early like cos we were meeting like 8 am? i was so tired... i crawled out of bed got changed and took a lift from my dad. was late le of course. so i met up with zhida... we reached like 8, 9 plus? the place was real empty... pple setting up and stuff.. there was this really this excitment in me. haha cant wait to start ar...

so zhida led me to the stall as i din noe where it was.. din go on thurs cos i had rugby training and interview... when i reached, i saw the 2 girls waiting for me cos i got all the goods ar haha... so we started setting up the stall. not much pple around.. was quite quiet... actually, when i reached the stall i was like wah... such a bad place for selling stuff. way at the back... at the corner somemore!!

haha... so anyway, slowly more and more pple came... i was like slowly warming up... thinking of a good sales pitch. been a long while since i did a sales pitch... when i was all warmed up, i was like a not stop tape recorder haha! i was like using the same words and style to bring pple to my stall. i was like bringing in all the customers... i dun blame the rest la... they got no experience ma... the only thing i din really like was when there's this really potential customer, one of the girls will like go up to them and ask them very gently if they wanted to buy. alamak. u do sales cannot gentle la. pple can push u off so damn easily! i kinda taught them how to do it but.. guess they're a lil timid la... haha...

so the day went by normal... i was like on form, but i needed rest too... so i did take some rest by making friends... haha... oh ya.. i saw this girl at the stall opposite us... man.. she looks like michelle a lot! i was like thinking real hard who she resembles but i cant. haha.. so i juz told zhida and liyun that she resembles someone den i went to talk to a customer. i talkiing halfway, suddenly liyun shouted "oh i noe! she look like michelle!" den in my mind i was like "ya ya ya! michelle!" den i turned around and look at her, den i was like "ya. look sooooo alike!" den i turned back to my customer and forgot wad i was talking about hahahahaha...

ok... so i also wanted to hear her voice, see if she also sounds like michelle. so we were thinking of ways to hear her voice. haha... for me, u guys noe me la... i was thinking of the timid approach stand nearby and hopefully i can hear her voice. liyun wanted to try the indirect way of like going up and ask how much is their wax thingy. den zhida..... he wanted to do the damn direct way. juz go up and talk to her. haha... so in the end, we also nvr do anything. but of course manage to hear her voice la.. ok, her voice quite cute la... but michelle's voice is cuter. haha.. but she kinda resembles christine's voice. except christine's voice sharper la... haha..

so esther, her mom and her sis also came and visit.. pleasant surprise... man.. u noe how my heart juz melts whenever i see her... tt's y i dun want to see her... is like she's juz there but u cant hold her or her hand at least. cant be close to her cos she's not my gf... its such a torture for the both of us. haiz...

anyway, at night when there aint much customers, i was sooo bored.. went to chat with my newly made friends. haha... they're from yusof ishak sec. cool bunch of pple. had fun chatting with em. halfway through my chat, something happened... teck way ended up with a fight as usual... with yin lei... din really see wad happened but definitely they quarrelled and teck way started throwing things at her. i only saw the tape thingy fly and hit yin lei den scare away the opposite's stall customers.. ( u now the thing that holds the scotch tape and has a metal thingy for tearing?? ) obviously yin lei threw it back but i din see that happened.

so i was like going back to my stall and saw teck way quiet quiet down there... but i juz ignored la... he was head down, staring at the table... den mr chiang walked by and saw him den he asked me if teck way ok or not so i was like ok la... den mr chiang said " but he is bleeding leh. " den i go see the side of his face. wah! bleed so much ar! it like kinda trickled down from a cut and it dripped on his pants. when i told him to go wash it, he shouted at me. "gun kai la!" it means get lost la! everybody like stared at him think he siao one but... he caused that prob himself. so i left him alone..

soon, it was time to pack up... he still sat there. din move, din budge. i was lik ok. go ask st john help tell me how to clean. so i was like telling them " juz go see wad happened and how to clean. dun touch him, dun talk to him." so they had a look at it. they told me wad to do la... minor stuff. so i wet a tissue and asked him to clean the wound. he ignored me. so i bent forward to try clean it but he moved back. tried again, same thing. so i told the girls go home first den i'll wait for him and den go home. the st john also left us alone... zhida with me. i talked to him... den he started breathing heavily. i knew he was filled with grief and anger so i told him to cry it out... so he did.

we juz stayed there for over an hour and he was like juz crying there... miss tee and his mom are all worried. they called me to check and stuff.. told them he was fine.. i had news tt his dad was coming to pick him. so i juz talked to him and prayed for him as well.. sat there and tried to console him. his bro came up and picked him.. he listens to his bro i guess... his bro like juz grab him up and brought him down... so me and zhida escorted em down...

ok. i was hungry, tired, and my eyes were all sore.. i'm suppose to wear my contacts lenses for only 12hrs but i wore it for abt 16 hrs... my dad picked me and zhida up as it was damn late le... dropped zhi da off at cck mrt and brought me to mac to get a meal. reached home only to find my final working comp down. cannot type blog so i juz went to sleep... it was like 12 already and i had to wake up at 7 the next morning...

to be continued...

ah!!! finally ok liaoz!

alright! finally i can type! haha... yea.. it's been a while since i can type.. haha... finally... gotta change the song of my blog.. noe u guys experience some pop ups in my blog... ok.. so for the past 3 days, i have been having very little sleep.... very stressful days... and i am damn sleepy now. so i will type about wad happened in the entrepreneur competition tml cos i need to sleep.. tml still got rugby... 8 am ar!!!!!!! tampinese ar!!!!!!

haiz... see if i can get the michelle look a like photo and post it on my blog. haha... soo... tml den tell u guys everything or should i say later cos it is 12.30 in the morning... i go sleep le.. nitez pple. come back and read tml ar! cya!~

stressful ar!!

haiz... these few days have to rush my work for entrpreneur comp really very rush ar... haiz.. thank God for being there to help me or i wont be able to survive through.. man... God's gracious!!

ok so today i reached school at 8 am. i am like half dead.. not enough sleep la... last night i slept early somemore... wah laoz.... so frustrating... den had training... only 7 pple came. but training was very meaningful today haha.. learned a lot of stuff... i din take breakfast this morning, so half way through training, i was kinda feeling faint... nearly went down... ahah.. my eyes kinda whited out and my body felt jelly like. haha..got my coach so worried. but i told him i ok. haha..so continue training.

wah... soooo damn tired and thirsty.. today worst den physical con.. really mental training. trying to stay alive in the hot weather... finally he was done... wah felt damn good. wanted to go buy drink. no coins!!! thank God i met this teacher who gave me a dollar. with that dollar and my 20 cents, i manage to buy 3 packets of drinks. ahh... so nice... Thank God for blessing me with such teachers.. haha. (guess wad, that teacher was one of the few who interviewed me.)

ok. so i bathed and got changed.. man.. i should have brought a t-shirt.. cant stand wearing uniform the whole day but no choice la. got interview... i juz slacked in the comp lab for like 5 hours... until my team mates came back from suntec. all drenched.. heavy rain ar... that zhi da also. dunnoe how to shelter girls.. haha.. shelter himself nia. hahahaha!!

so we had to rush our biz plan.. like siao ar! so stressful!! lab assistant rushing us, go down to office and do, mr chee rushing us.. but finally, we manage to complete it. on the way to bind our biz plan, we realise haven print something argh!!!! i was so worried. but thank God, He opened a way for us when there was no way... we reached the shop at 7.30 and i checked wad time they close. 8.30. how can one of us rush back home, print, and come back!? but guess wad! when we reached the shop, tt zhi da blur blur point at some floppy disk advertisement at the shop. we looked and it was a computer we can use to print our stuff!!! thank God!! why in the world would there be a comouter there!? i dunnoe. all of us were so damn happy. i dunnoe if wad i type make sense cos i'm rushing to finish this entry haha..

GOD IS GOOD!!

ok. so me and zhi da go celebrate.. cos finally finished our biz plan.. so much hard work... we went to eat laksa. haha. wah.. so nice ar... den sat there and chatted like forever.. haha... everyone like leave liaoz, we still there haha.... nice la.. juz happy we finished our stuff... actually today a lot of things happened but cant type em all down or else this entry will be damn long. juz wanna thank God.... praying every morning works... haha!

busy days..

these few days really very busy ar... today i spent like my whole day in the comp lab. from when it opened at 8.30 to 5.30. in the evening... more work was done only when li yun came. haha... i was like slacking... got do work la.... but too lazy to do these stuff.. i only did the more active stuff like walking down to bukit timah and collect stocks. haha.. so many things to carry. thank God janet was willing to fetch me back to school after collecting the goods... man... janet is really a blessing from God to help me do this business... thank God i worked during first 3 months. den i met her on the streets. or else, i'll be finding suppliers like siao. haha...

ok. so maple was down the whole day today... i cant play maple in school... at least got pple like millie and the ruggers come in... was chatting and playing the comp with her la. she like so fierce ar. haha. but fun disturbing her ar. haha... was disturbing her when akira logged in haha... actually disturbed both of them ahahaaha!!! ok, she's the type no one talk to her, she can die one haha.. so entertain her la. but i not the type to entertain her. only will make her pissed but she damn bored ar. so muz ren hahahaha!

so after tt, the ruggers came in so chatted with em and stuff.. at least not so boring. haha... but nothing much happened juz tt we juz keep disturbing each other. haha...

sian.... boring day ar... slept in the comp lab while the girls print and cut the lettering i made for the banner. i too tired.. haha... after finish the banner juz nice time to go home liaoz. i pack all the goods; stuff into my bag, pack into the box, fold the plastic bag and carry most of em with me. some zhiting carry. so went to church with a whole box of items.. wah... so heavy.. on mrt no place to sit haiz... by the time reach church, hands soft liaoz. went down early cos i tot brother stanely want to have the prayer thingy but dunnoe wad happened. nothing... nvm. so had to do duty la..

ok. so when pastor came up to preach, i felt i should listen so i went out to listen. after a while, i felt like sleeping. so find declan and sleep. he so squishy, can be my pillow. haha... so sleeping ended up in wrestling. we ended up wrestling until of us get strangled and is forced to say out 'mamee'. haha. so funny. dun think i keep losing hor. maybe last time when i'm weak la. haha.. now i can torture declan equally and matthew becomes spectator. haha... fun la... but i think tml, i'm gonna listen to sermon more.. haha..

ok la. stop here le. no maid to do house work, now i have to go clear rubbish and water plants to babye. oh ya. tml got intrview liaoz. feeling nervous ar.... haha.. and finally, come down to suntec to support my team k!!

rush rush rush!!

ar!!! have to rush like siao ar!! i'm on a dead line and i'm not working!!! this is worst den school projects... haiz.... i've gotta rush my biz plan.. man.. i feel like a business man rushing my proposal... so stressful. i think i want to be a boss in future. den pple rush to meet MY needs wuahahahahaha!!!

so, went down to the supplier to settle stuff.. pricing and all.. we have to do our own packaging too.. haiz.. she cant cope la.. so have to help her.. anyway, she's nice to me. so i dun mind help her though it aint my job.. ha.... gonna work with her in future to sell ideas... hope i earn money... so erm... today spent most of my time at bukit timah discussing and things like tt... competition's on this friday.. so fast.... very rush ar... now is like the only slack time i have to play comp. and my mom's stopping me cos it'll cause me to have insomia at night... she says my brain becomes too active when i try to sleep. is not that i sleep late or wad... i noe when to stop la of course..

so last night gave me some depressent to put me to sleep.. i might as well juz drink beer haha... i kinda did fall asleep after some time.. haha... every nigt i'd listen to the late night show.. so nice... aha... ok.. back to wad i did today. so i went to dec's house cos my sis told me uncle boyle called to say tt there's bowling. i tot cck ppl going but like all jurong den i was thinking like very extra sia.. but i juz went cos i tot it'll be fun and cos my sis wants to go down.. so when i reached i realise all boys. haha.. my poor sis... went back home.. haha...

ok.. so i nvr bowl for really long time.. haha.. i kinda sucked in the begging but after two games, i kinda got better... hitting nine pins or spare.... like no strike sia.... (wah guess wad... my sis so daring.. as i'm typing this, she got out a can of beer haha... my mom making lil bit of noise la.. haha..) den like so fast 2 hours of bowling ended. actually i wanted to go for the seminar but i needed to cut hair for my SC/FL interview cos tml and the day after no time... thursday my interview.. so i dropped by and played with dec in the video room cos like got nothing to set up.. haha.. dunnoe where everyone went. by the time they came back, i needed to leave.. haha...

ok.. i went back to that saloon. haha... she washed my hair for me again.. haha.. sooo nice. den cut liao, she wash again.. ahhh... so shiok.. haha.. (now drinking beer... haha.. i juz drank one mouth and my face feels so wierd haha.. not cut out to drink beer i guess..) she put that cherry flavour gel again den like go lrt, everyone smell den look at me haha... so embarrassing.

ok la.. typed enoug for today.... go relax and try to sleep le.. tml i meeting in school 8 am... dunnoe whether want to go for a run a not... since lab will be open whole day, so shiok haha.. can sleep inside.. cool huh... kk good night ppl. miss all millenians.. nvr see u guys for so long le...

juz some stuff..

ok... so i juz came back from dinner.... went out with my mum to pick my dad from the airport, den we wanted to go eat black pepper crab. but i very reluctant to spend such money cos i have to go fever 04, den my dad wants to give my ex-maid some money cos her son got accident. den we juz went for some shark's fins recently at some thai restaurant... haiz.. so much money wasted. so i kinda suggested going for steam boat at marina south cos i kinda miss that time when we went down for dinner.. fun ar..

had quite a nice time there, but i think it would be nicer if i went there with friends.. haha.. i love the beef there and the chicken. haha... since it is a buffet, i ate all i wanted haha! so full!!! but muz make ur 12 bucks worth wad... my family din regret going there cos it is more worth den black pepper crab.

anyway, today was a very relaxed day. juz spent time at home playing comp the whole day. haha... so let's talk about some stuff... i think i've gotta go cut my hair cos it is getting real long. den my damn teeth!! their getting quite out of place cos of my wisdom tooth!! gonna go do something about it soon. guess i've gotta extract.. hope i dun need to wear braces.. gonna be a chore if i have to... hmmm... since there's no maid now, my family kinda seem more like a family. we are much closer working together cleaning up the house.(though my mom and sis does the most work and i juz sit around and chill. hah!) ok, so we are not experienced in house chores. and tt explains for my messy room, ants in the study room. a smelly kitchen cos of trash not taken out by blah blah.. u guys can imagine la.. haha..

today i juz feel so sick.. maybe i ate the wrong stuff or wad the night before... my tummy hurt since morning before i woke up all the way till evening... den i was having a flu.. kept sneezing! i think it's my mom's perfume or wad.. hah.... haiz... i'm growing fatter too i think.. have not been exercising except for trainings... trying to do some weight carrying when ever i'm free..

sooo.... juz wanna say some stuff to esther.... juz now as we left the airport, i kinda heard this song which is on my blog now. kinda made me think of her and some things of the past.. it's been like 4 months since we break? i kinda feel hard for me to love her now.... i tried. bt i really cant. i din mean to hurt u. ut since u left me, many things happened.. i think it feels nice being single... n0w i feel like i'm lilo... haha.. talking like her.. ya... wad lilo said is quite true things are nice when u are single.... i guess i should not use the word lilo too... i think i should juz use her real name.... who wants to have a nick name right? so michelle was kinda right about all those stuff... i juz cant patch with u, esther cos i'll juz suddenly be stressed up and i'll juz keep thinking of a lot of things. i'm worried things won't work out and problems might repeat itself.. u noe i felt real stress today not calling u. cos remember in the past how often we called each other?? yea..i felt so guilty that i actually did call ur house but i guess no one's home. din want to msg cos i wanted to act blur... sorry...

last night i had a lot thought about the patching thingy.. juz cant stop thinking about it. but i was kinda chatting with jess which kind of help me keep my mind off things... she's a really cool person that can make me look damn stupid. haha.. juz fun la. we kinda talked about our problems... so it was quite nice having someone to talk to since now a days i also dun see michelle online. maybe it's cos i'm playing games.. but like i said last time, dun wanna disturb her le.. later cos probs in school...

hmmm... playing maple also quite good la... got some guys there i can talk to also.... play and chat... haha.. fun.... those guys can be real stupid and farny... haha... enjoy playing maple... now like so laggy. so many pple starting new accounts...

i think i'll stop here la. i feel like playing maple now..

Rugby fever!!

argh!! i still cant stop thinking of my game.. man... so exciting.. i feel like playing rugby now.. man.. the excitment is killing me... nah nah nah nah~ nah nah nah nah~ hey ay ay~ MI! it was all about team spirit. man... i loved that last game... i'm so glad i got to play in that game... man... it was wonderful....

so... nothing much today la. feel like keeping today a secret too... haha.... i feel so wierd now.. doing lots of thinking. damnit i feel so fickle minded! argh... i feel stupid for some reason..

ok. so i'm kinda starving now cos i din take lunch and dinner... haiz... no maid... now i realise ow pampered i used to be.. kk stop here le..

nothing much today..

ok.. so nothing much happened today, juz tt the scratch from yesterday match hurts a lot and i dunnoe why. is like my shirt touch and rub a lil very pain.. make wearing shirt so uncomfortable. last night also cannot sleep properly initially cos of the irritating pain... hah...

oh ya, i remember something tt happened yesterday. haha.. before the TP match, johnny asked us if we wanted to see his thongs. haha... guess wad after the match, we were like celebrating so... he showed us. hahahhahahahaha.. his underwear tore!! haha...

ok... so i din do anything much today, found out tt i'll be going to indonesia in december.. help them build house ar.. aha... i dunnoe do wad la... go show them God's love... that's the main idea. i dunnoe y.. but i realluy love muslims... haha.. cool bunch of pple... gonna enjoy myself.. i dunnoe whether they purposely change location o make me go or wad, but cos i said i wanted to go indo, that night, evelyn told me they're looking for some area in indonesia.. but i really want to rush back for the sentosa touch game... i want to play!!! i want to do that dummy split thingy... get another award or wadever... ahaha... i want to play!! GOD HOW???

so, next week's gonna be real busy cos of my entrepreneur competition.. lots of preparation to be done... preparation which would take weeks to complete is squeezed into 1 week for me... how!? haiz.... got to redo our survey form thingy too.. GOD HOW!???

so now, i'm watching Singapore idol though i know the results le... haiz.. so sad... feel sorry for both girls.. haiyo... so heart breaking... ok... now got nothing to say le so i'll be going off to play games.

The Results..

hah... ok... it was quite disappointing... we lost to UWC which was expected, draw with SRjC which was a damn big disappointment and lost to freaking PJ! i wa so damn upset man... but finally we beat TP! i was soooo damn happy when i eard we're playing TP. i so damn want to play with Hannan and Jasper. ok.. TP's game was a lil shocking.... they are rough man...

so.... first minute, i could have brought the ball real far cos TP's winger gave me a gap 15 metres wide! but damn it la. my freaking hands suck! the game started and straight away me and zhi wei saw that big gap. stupid me argh!!!! feel like killing myself. wad is stupid is that not only i dropped the ball, i thought it was a knock on and i din pick up the ball! stupid ar! if not, i still could bring it real far or even score try if sadiq loop me. confirm. i very confident. haha.... stupid la... there goes my chance of proving myself...

ok. another dumb thing haha.. got this guy whom i was suppose to tackle haha.. i tracked him real well but he was side stepping me and i was ready to tackle him. i marked the spot liaoz. den i went too low. cos i wanted to hit his knees den he nvr move front and i fell to the ground FLAT! haha.... so malu... damn.. haha... but we made a come back during second half.. haha feng shui... or is it cos vick tossed the coin so lucky.. lol... personally, i think it was God who helped us. we pushed TP all the way to their try line. i think we won cos they had sooo many penalty. kept punching my team members. haha... serve em right. dun play dirty la.. even we also wanted but did not.. we wanted to do high tackles. haha...

it felt good man.. especially when i went into the ruck. haha.. so stupid. TP pple falling over themselves. den i was flipping them looking for ball. suddenly referee blow whistle "knock-on!" haha... yay.. our ball. haha.. nice game... i loved the last game.. boosted all our morale.. we were craving to score man.. it was soo cool...

ok so we are bowl champions... haha sounds nice ar... but in reality, we are 5th. haha... there's still cup, plate and shield. blah blah blah... not bad la 5th. beat all those we're suppose to beat EXCEPT damn PJ. we're going for a rematch with em for 15s. man.. gonna hit em real hard. they really made me damn sad ar.. their supporters and everything... haiz... they got girls support we dun have sia...

anyway, i'm going for my dinner le. babye!

Today's the day...

hah.. i'm soo excited... time for the M1 tens. i cant wait to get on the field... hope i can play more then the last time but i got the feeling tt i'll have to play defense again... haiz... but anyway, i'm going there for experience. cant wait to play haha... yea!! hope we can do well in our division so tt we can play tp. hope they top their division too.. wanna see how hannan and jasper play. sooo damn excited arz!!! haha...

ok. so i'm gonna meet kira for lunch soon. after which we will be heading down to yio chu kang.... haha.. cannot wait ar!!! kk seeya tonight. tell u guys the result. hope it wont be something disappointing. i'll be praying for the match hope God'll help us! bye!

Im Sorry.....

i have been giving a lot of thoughts about me and ec... i really dunnoe if we should patch... i noe this will hurt u a hell lot. and so i'm sorry... though things between me and ec are more or less ok le, i dunnoe if we should be together ever again... i really love u. but i dunnoe how much. i dunnoe if i'll take good care of u... i dunnoe if there can be a us... my heart is not sure and my brain says no. i dunnoe wad to do...

as i browse through all those letters u gave me, i really noe how much u love me. i noe how much u want us to be together. i noe how u feel... but i dunnoe whether we should be together... there's a big world out there, many other better guys... many other different pple who might be better than me.

i think we should not see each other. cos when i see u, i fall in love with u again and i dun want tt to happen, cos it is only when i'm with u tt i love u. but once we are not together, i lost tt feeling... i really enjoy tt day we went out to orchard... i'd never forget tt day. i love the part when were in the quiksilver shop looking for board shorts and jeans.. i kinda love it when u are shopping with me. it's ike we're a family kind of feel. but... it only lasted a while... remember tt guy who kept staring at u when we crossed the bridge all the way to the other side?? haha... i really felt like shouting back at him "stare wad stare!" but i kinda pretended i dunnoe u. i kinda had the feeling that u were not mine and i cant take u as mine.

i really dunnoe if wad i'm doing now is right but i'm taking things step by step. right now, my heart tells me this is the right thing to do... yet i'm not sure... i'm sorry... i love u... even now, i cant make myself like another girl cos i noe tt u still love me... i may like a girl but when i think of u, i juz cant make myself like her though u and i are not together... it's like a habbit, like when i'm with u. during those days when i'm with u. i've never really cared about any other girls. all cared was tt i have u. i was very contented... now, i really cant like any other girl. i can like but i cant bear to tell them my feelings cos its like i still have u but i dun. i dunnoe how to explain... its a very wierd feeling of not daring to go into a relationship with another girl. like a curse.. i think its like if i go into a relationship with another girl, i feel that i've let tt girl down cos i still have part of my heart with u. and i feel it's wrong cos u should love someone with your whole heart. there will only be problems if there's someone else in ur heart.. maybe till the day either one of us part tt i'm free from this guilt. the guilt of knowing that u love me yet i am not doing anything to salvage our relationship.

i decided to put this same song as u cos it kinda touches my heart... makes me understand how much u love me... makes me feel tt there's always someone who would love me even though the whole world is against me.

i think i dun want to be with u cos it's like i'm pushed to a dead end where i cant love any other person except u. but i want to have the choice to choose, yet i dun want to be greedy. its really very difficult.. i guess... i will regret saying this cos many pple wll be reading my blog but anyway, i shall say. u will always be in my heart till the day either of us part. i dunnoe if i can ever get over u. but u'll still take that portion of my heart with u..

maybe i was a lil harsh (updated)

i guess i am a lil harsh on her.. i dunnoe wad to do. i called her to say sorry already. but i guess she's still unhappy with me. fine den.. its best to be like this. having our lives. i still dunnoe if i should have patched or not.. maybe not la... we'll still have problems.. she does not noe wad i like and hate.. bound to have things she'll do to hurt me.. its always like this... even when we're together, she'd nvr like to be close to me..

so anyway, i had school today. did nothing much except chat chat chat. haha.. fun ya? in the end had to rush my work finish haha.. den this morning i could not wake up on time again haha... yesterday i slept 5 hours after writing blog. haha.. and i found a way to put myself to sleep. turn 180 degrees around and sleep haha... it works. lol.. feng shui?? haha... den have mild burns all over my back and nose.. haha... yesterday training la.. so hot under the sun. den tml will be the same thing again...

ok. i am gonna go play games.

*****************************************

ok... so, i slept after writing this entry haha.. woke up, played games. den esther called me so that means things ok liaoz.. hmmm.. today no dinner.. now i'm so hungry.. my mum din cook as well... so i'll be starving tonight... haiz... my stomach.... aww.... ok. back to games seeya pple!

No Explanation Needed

i dun need any explanation from her. she tell me she very fan. that guys is nothing. ya right. i dun trust u le.. last time 'hu' aso the same thing. tell me got nothing with him blah blah blah. next thing i noe, u are expressing ur eternal love for him in front of me.. ya right want me to believe? i've learnt my lesson le. once u tell me u fan tt means u also got feelings for that guy. and how nice of u say me like so many girls and stuff. u are no different hypocrite. i can say one thing. i have really left girls aside already. i thought i could be with u again. hah. i guess not. i dun trust and believe u anymore.. dun need to tell me u love me or wadeva shit. they're all lies.

heck. stupid stuff... anyway, i had insomia yesterday night. i could not sleep till 4.30 am. i think i had too much things in mind. had business things on mind, had rugby stuff and had some giggles thinking of some funny stuff... haha.. it was about a game. next time i'm gona use that game to sabo pple so i can sit back and laugh haha... maybe if i am OG leader next year, i want to try it with the guys. haha.. imagine guys *i***n* lol! haha... secret for now. akira noes wad it is. but dun tell pple k? if not no one want to play. haha....

ok. so anyway, i could not wake up for rugby training.. my mom was pushing me the whole morning. brush teeth den back to the bed. change, den back again to the bed. pack back den..... ya the same thing over and over. hahaha.... i am still tired.. wadz worst is that training today was sooooo HOT! dried me... add on with my lack of sleep, i had a headache. din say anything cos i felt that the ruggers would say i'm bullshitting. so i juz went on with training. fun la..

so bathe sooooo shiok! den came home no food. had to go down buy... now i'm so sleepy... so...... gonna........... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.......

My business

ok so i am planning to start my own business so that while i study, i have money. i am now thinking of an idea.. anyone interested, can contact me. i dunnoe whether i want to run solo or with partners but if anyone's interested, juz tell me, i'll see how la. now looking for raw materials and manufacturers and stuff.. man... start from scratch. cool huh...

why i decided to start somehing is cos my maths C is a goner, so... i have to have a back up plan right? that's why i gonna think of something... hopefully by next month... gona be real busy though.. but i'll do my best.. maybe i'll start with some partnership work with the e-club members... they seem interested.

so... this morning went down to look at some things that we are planning to sell for our competition. i think the items are not bad. i believe we'll do real well for this competition, with God's grace that is. goona pray real hard for this coming comp.. wanna do well. hope i can meet some real entrepreneurs and maybe get their name cards or wad. haha...

so i doing some advertising now and it will tke place for a few of my entries..

E-Club competition pls support us!!

drop by suntec on the 26,27 and the 28.

time: i forgot. will update again.

stall name: little fingers (i came up with this. cute huh?? heh)

we're selling hand made items which are 'finger looking good'

(came up with that too.. heh....)

pls support us

i'll try to post some picture of our products soon... do try come down..

later after our discussion, i went out with esther... i dunnoe whether i regretted or not. juz by going out like this, i kinda fell in love with her again.. can say i wanted a patch. i really enjoyed my day.. went around looking for surf stuff.. went to all those surfers shops... want to buy a lot of clothes now.. haha.. so now i'm saving. haha...

ayway, the day did not turn out too nice in the end.. guess.. she has another guy and yet she says she loves me.. argh!! all lies... this sux. all of u were right man.. once we broke up, i should have never thought of patching. WHAT THE FREAKING SHIT WAS I THINKING ABOUT! damn. all lies, pretends, acts. wallace... yeah, nothing, some actor hah! ya right. some other guy. cant believe it.. u made me love u again and break my heart. you really enjoy it yea.. i cant believe it man... i dunnoe wad girls are thinking. so hard to tell. one moment they love u, next u are shit to them. hah.... i dunnoe wad i was thinking man.. back to square one.. all the pain.... i rather be left alone... this sux. so bad. i dunnoe wad io was thinking... wad he hell was i thinking!!! we'll never be together! why give her the chance.. the damn chance to break ur heart again.. hah... ya.. wad was i thinking...

those pple who want to noe who wallace is, as in the real wallace. i found his blog... http://wallacehuojianhua.blogdrive.com/

gonna be a busy week..

haiz.. next week is gonna be a real busy week.. i got to get my buisness plan ready for the comp and the plan is gonna take quite a lot of time to do.. haiz.. stupid la... give us only 2 weeks to prepare haiz... den got rugby training, den this friday, gonna have our M1 10s.. man.. i'm so excited.. hopefully i can play yeah!! pls...

so erm.. today i finally got to watch finding nemo.. so sad... but, it's a nice show. watched it at dec's house.. so i was juz relaxing there and nearly fell asleep there.. was sooo tired.. anyway, after the show, had to go back and set up for evening service... on duty again....

ok... after had dinner with most of the youths at bukit timah.. din eat much but was quite full. sat down, chat.. was nice la... den go home... when i reached home, i on the comp and guess wad. freaking hell lag! why!? cos there's porn in it! how!? how the heck i noe! cant be my sis, cos nothing happened the night before when i was playing.. so now i become the main suspect... haiz... but my mom din say anything. i told her about the probs.. den when i try to delete, cannot ar.. keeps coming back. wadz worst is that i cant go into 'my computer' and the 'control panel'.... how?? wad to do? tell me how to get rid leh if u noe...

the stupid IE bar came again like wad happened to my laptop when i had a pop up in kelvin's blog. the pop up forced me to press yes. haha.. some of us who went to kelvin's blog kena. but now dun have le.. den best thing is that i did not click any pop up in this comp, how could there be this thing? auto install??? muz be got pple hack into my comp and used it to surf porn.... haiz... they so desperate haha... idiotic pple... dumb entrepreneurs who hire pple to create bugs to attack other companies.. stupid pple. make gaming worldwide a pain. damn u pple! hah! hope some idiot hu creates viruses reads this and den sends one and attack my comp. maybe my mom might buy a new comp then.. haha.. stupid pple...

ok. enugh of my dumb comp. i'm a good boy k. so i dun go porn hee! trust me! hmmm... sooo... tml... dunnoe wad to do ar.. ec ask me go out and i'm not going sentosa with my class guys cos lil pple going le.. den i also need to do up my business plan... i think i shall spend tml doing up my business plan la... dun go out.. ec... maybe might go out... 40% go... dunnoe la... i think single quite relax.. dun need to worry about ur gf... but.. i miss out on having someone loving me.. except my family mambers la! forever love me one. haha... kk. i go do my stuff le. bye!

Good Neighbours' Day

nothing much to talk about today.. woke up in the morning, psycoed zhida to go for the course with me.. or else i'll be stuck with teck way.. TG.. so i went for the course.. a lil boring.. ok la... dunnoe wad to say about it..

ok. so came home had good neighbours' day. so invited neighbours over for dinner... not bad.. quite fun. met a new guy whom i allowed him to play my maple account and died many times!!!! argh! haha... but its ok.. so anyway, had my dinner after everyone else had theirs...

after they left, played maple and my guitar... long time nvr touch my beloved wife.. hee.. ok.. so din do much la.. boring day...

oh ya... zhi da keep toking about ger today haha... met new girl and stuff.. haiyo.. like despo sia.. hahahaha... den he go course wear like house clothes haha... should have taken photo show u all. haha... gonna be busy next whole week.. sianz... got entrepreneur stuff to get ready, buisness plan to complete.. haiz...

i wish they would send me off to indonesia during my competition week. haha.. anyway, this friday will be our M1 10s looking forward to it. hope we get to play tp cos i wanna face hannan and jasper. hope we get to meet em on the field. it'll be a great disappointment if we dun. i hope i can play.... haiz... pls pls pls let me play!! jasper... a scout juz like me.. din really liked him but nvr held any grudges against him though..always disturbing me.. haiz..

soo.. gotta go sleep. nitez!

-=Maple Story=-

ok... so i had nothing to do today. spent the whole day playing maple.. haha.. fun ar.. den nvr do much except stopping a while to watch tv, bathe and other stuff..

ok... i did do some work out before i bathe.. i feel like i'm growing fatter.. how?? haha.... ok... nothing much to talk about today. last night, i was about to go to sleep... was listening to 98.7 late night show. like it a lot.. haha. den when it ended at 2, i could not sleep.. so was juz thinking.. den suddenly decided to take out those letters esther gave me after we broke.. i was kind of thinking of her ---- the old her... the innocent and naive one.. the one when i first met.. i still love that esther a lot... esther has changed a lot ever since we started going out.. maybe, it is my fault.. teach her bad stuff... hah... she used to be sooo sweet.. but she always like dun dare acknowledge my presence especially in church. disliked it...

anyway, i took out those letters cos i want to see the old her.. was looking at our first photo, the one during her b'dae.. ah.. the red spag stripe... looks nice on her.. den the other one at sentosa juz after her b'dae. kinda miss that short hair blur blur girl.. haha.. kinda msged her and asked her if she wanted to chat. so ya. she called my hp. chatted a lil.. so nice hearing her voice... maybe cos i was feeling lonely, and wanted to hear the voice i used to depend on whenever i am sad.. now, no lilo to talk to... the other i dun noe her well.. lilo... she's real nice to chat with. but... i think i kinda ruin her reputation.. haiz...

so chatted with ec till i decided to go sleep.. den nothing liao la... kk.. i go sleep le.. so late liaoz.

Deep A Valli

wad ever it means. haha... have no idea why i wrote that, juz felt it sounded cute ha... haiz.. isn't deepavalli supposed to be a holiday? but.... i still had an entreprenuer course... actually, it was quite fun la. it was enjoyable. learnt a lot of stuff... guess, i have to drop my dream of doing science instead, maybe i'd be an entrepreneur when i grow up.

hmmm.. there was this CHIJ sec girl.. haha.. she's pretty. hah... oh yea. we watched a video of last year's entrepreneur competition. man.. our school actually did not too bad.. had quite a few awards... man.. soo inspiring. i really want to bring back an award this time.. hope we can work well together. i have confidence. i am juz worried about our other group... still considering if we should break up into 2 groups or we should work together.. but i am really worried that they cant come up with something on time.. some more, we dun have months but only 2 weeks... hope they can do it...

sooo..... after the course, i came home... halfway, i kinda regretted not doing something. thought of it the day before but i din execute it today. hah.. i have no guts.. but wad i was going to do is a secret. nothing to do with lilo ec or wadever, not even with that CHIJ girl. was my own stuff...

so... went home with zhida. when i reached cck mrt, i met colleen. haha.. cool... ok. so came home on the lrt. was thinking about the thing i should have done haha.. but it's over so i din really cared. maybe next time..

hmmm... was at home playing comp and stuff den heard the winter sonata songs.. haiz... kinda reminded me of how i used to love esther... man... winter sonata is like the theme between me and her.. i remembered how much she liked winter sonata ha... den i got her that necklace that was in the show.. forgot wad is the name of that necklace... haha. the one with many stars one.. i came to know about it while watching a clip from kazaa... den fabian told me he noe where got sell den we chiong go buy haha... all those memories... now, i totally have no feeling for her anymore... i'm a bad person.. my fault. nvr pei u, my fault neglect u.. u think i want ar... haiz...

din do much at home.. watch a show, quite nice.. the name of the show is "max keeble" or something like that.. disney show la... haha.. funny and nice.. dunnoe wad else i do liaoz so stop here. cya peeps!

some photos my sis took of me and some i took of her... =)

no hols for me on deepavali!!

argh!!! i got no hols ar... tml i still got entreprenuer course.. damn... burnt away my holidays.. ar.... sianz.. still have to wake up 7.am to get ready cos i have to meet the rest of the girls at 8.15... at jp some more.. haiz... now already 12 plus am... haha.. spent my time playing MS juz now... hee... tml confirm cannot wake up ar..

ok, so let's talk about today... let me recall... ah... recalling a lil now.. ok. so i woke up real late this morning.. about 9+ straight away jumped out of bed and bathe.. cos i need to go to school for SC stuff... so.... yea. got changed and all, deciding if i should wear uniform or not and whether i should carry bag.. haha stupid... i din want to carry bag but when i was about to leave the house, i felt real empty. so i placed my wallet in the bag and took it with me haha.. silly ya? den i wore uniform... full u.. i tot it was suppose to be soomething formal like the interview like tt haha..

so rushed down and i made it on time.. saw lilo on the way up to sch cos of her pouch haha.. ok so went up, saw johnny and they were still on the me and afiq thingy but not as bad as during training.. things were cold.. haha... today i got over it liao la so okok la.... went in, saw soooo many girl sia! nvm. sat down and wait for briefing to finish.

after that, we went to the hall for ice breakers.. haiya boring old stuff but entertaining.. i tot i was the most lucky one while playing the game. end up, i most suay ar.. but i dun feel like talking about it so.... skip!!~ ok.we were grouped up and had to do this banner thingy. it was kinda hard to think of wad to put in.. but in the end i kinda sang the hey-ya song which became the main frame for our banner.. ok lame.. so it was quite fun and all... enjoyed it

soon go home. so walked out with kira.. saw jj, lilo and hazel.. so kira stood around initially and talked.. they were gonna pei lilo till her mom arrived.. so i juz stayed around.. i din really feel nervous.. i dunnoe why.. but i felt wierd... especially when they disturb... dunnoe la.. i trying to act normal but difficult la... suddenly kira sat down. den i was like, ok... i should sit but... in front of her!? oh gosh... i kinda stunned down there blur tiao... den jj was like sit la.. den i ok la sit..

so kang ka.. i din dare look, move or anything.. haiz... i juz felt soooo wierd.. ok so lets skip this part too.. ok. so her mom came and we left school. met adlina and ah pok at bus stop. so kinda disturb her check out hu she likes.. haha.. regret a lil but its cool noeing some secrets. haha.. so i found out the 2 person she likes hah.. ok this part also SKIP! den i went home with them since they were going to woodlands.. cool. at least got pple accompany.

reach home, i was too sleepy to play maple so went to sleep.. sleep until night.. wake up bathe and go bbq... haha.. bbq nice ar.. at dec's house... like quite a romantic atmosphere...ah.... nice.... i manage to spend some time alone and do lots and lots of thinking.. solved many of my problems... the bbq was fun.. had mush mallows and all soo nice! den din do much around.. i was soo deep in thought that i began munching cucumbers... din really like the taste but since it was crunchy and juicy.. kinda quenched my thirst... but its nice crunching it and thinking about things at the same time..

so... chatted a lil with colleen... hmmm.. kinda enjoyed her company... kept my mind off stuff.. but the time i had chatting was limited cos my grandma had the feats. so we rushed home.. haiya.. of all time... but nvm.. enjoyed myself overall... sooo, came home and played maple.. met kelv online. den stop cos we needed to type blog and i need to sleep... tml got course... so nite pple!

i love rugby!!

hah!!! i juz love rugby sooo much! had lots of fun today.. began with some agility obnstacle course thingy. haha fun.. den we had tackling practice. cool! very fun but i got my clothes all dirty... argh.. it was sooooo dirty... had to wash it before i brought it home.. injured my little finger.. haiz.. the bone ar... now got difficulty moving it cos very pain.. haiz...

we played touch after training, fun la. juz that ah fek had to always blame m for everything even though it doesn't involve me.. so stupid.. but heck la. i wont talk about. dun want to start insulting team mates. haiz.. not the first time liaoz.. only he have problem with me.. dun understand him..

anyway, my day have been quite fine.. at night after training, went down to clementi with kira and seng.. wanted to have some tang yuan, but close la... haiz.. i juz cant forget those sec sch times.. haha me and gabe loh would go round clementi to eat tang yuan or tako. den we'd go home together say some jokes and stuff... kinda enjoy those times...

ok back to wad we did..... me seng and kira had tako and we're juz talking about some stuff.. rugby, girls, sentosa... haha.. din feel like going home la, but they have to... so we finished our ice cream and go home... during that period of time, i kinda sort sort again... i kept missing someone, but i dunnoe which one.. argh!!! sooooo stupid! i'm so pissed with myself.. no matter how hard i try not to think of them, i'll automatic juz miss one of em.... haiz....

now i juz feel sooo lonely.. later i think i'll drop by 7-11 and get a drink.. feel like drinking something nice.. but nothing alcoholic la... juz feel like drinking something not found at home.. haiz... i feel like sitting downstairs, some where lonely and do some thinking... back to my favourite past time of the past.. haiz.. in the past i'm like some dumb kid who's forever in depression... hah... ok let's not talk about my painful past...

so anyway, i was looking for that fixing a broken heart song and i kinda found this blog http://princess-w3irdy.blogspot.com/ it has quite a nice song.. haha.. i found out that this girl, is samantha's friend cos of friendster.. maybe you'll pple might want to have a look.. so.. thatz all for tonight...

Fried eyes...

hai.. my eyes are all fried.. have been playing maple story almost the whole day... haha.... woke up in the morning, i came out and play with kelvin and shi hui.. haha.. kelvin volunteer to go fetch her sia.. haha.. den i party those 2 ar.. they keep going pa toh.. haha.. den keep chatting.. all my experience points all give em sia.. i trained so hard hah... i level up twice today *yay* hehe... den i collected more than 30 ores today!! haha.... those playing maple story will noe wad i'm talking about hee!

ok.. so i din do much today except for eat, sleep, comp, tv.. haha... feel like a girl.. lol! haha... but i did do some work out. haha... trained until my arms are sore.. did some light weight lifting, sit ups and all... took a shower, came back pay comp har har...

sooo... was real bored today.. but i'm refraining myself from msging girls haha... trying not to get too involved in any girl.. juz keep my distance... have been through too much trouble.. dun want to start another.. haiz... dennis. if u reading this, i miss u ar! haha.... shi hui too... so one day go out k?? haha.. miss those times when we were sitting behind pamela.. haha.. that greedy girl.. haha... we like to tempt her last time.. me and den... den will like ask her " u want? u want?" den she say "ya ya ya ya!" then den will open the packet and say........... "NO MORE!" hahahahahaha!!!!

miss those days.. ar........ anyway, i hope things on wednesday will turn out fine.. so that all of us can enjoy our sentosa outing with kai's henderson girls and the cedar tennis girls... looking forward to it man.. it was really fun the last time... hah.... hmm... tml, i'm gonna have training.. yeah... lazy to go to school, but i still love playing touch and all. haha... dunnoe whether my coach dropping by... if he is, den there wont be too much touch games...

anyway, it's real late now... gonna go turn on the radio and listen to music until i fall asleep.. haha.. it have kinda become a daily routine.. haha... kk.. so good night pple... sweet dreams all..

Fixing A broken Heart...

by AZN Dreamers

There was nothing to say
The day she left

Just filled a suitcase full of regrets
I held a taxi in the rain
Looking for someplace to ease the pain

Then like an answered prayer
I turned around and found you there

*CHORUS*
You really know where to start
Fixing my broken heart
You really know what to do
Your emotional tools can cure any fool
Whose dreams have fallen apart
Fixing a broken heart

Oh yeah

Now I don't understand what I'm going through
There must be a plan that lead me to you
Because the hurt just disappears
In every moment that you are near
Yeah

Just like an answered prayer
You made the loneliness easy to bear

*CHORUS*
You really know where to start
Fixing my broken heart
You really know what to do
Your emotional tools can cure any fool
Whose dreams have fallen apart
Fixing a broken heart

Soon the rain will stop falling baby
And I'll forget the past
Cause here we are at last

*CHORUS*
You really know where to start
Fixing a broken heart
You really know what to do
Your emotional tools can cure any fool
Whose dreams have fallen apart
Fixing a broken heart

Fixing a broken heart

********************************************

This song is kinda dedicated to lilo.... erm.. i noe it might sound a lil silly and wierd doing sucha thing but, it doesnt really mean anything. it's juz how i felt about her last time. i din noe how to express it to her or anyone else. but this is how i felt. this song says it all maybe not exactly but the meaning's there. really, it doesnt mean anything, so pple, dun get the wrong idea k? yea feelings and all i had for her, was in the past. now the present, i juz want to be alone. hah... i'm a bad person. dun deserve anyone...dun wanna cause anymore problems too..

still trying to look for the midi or mp3. but u pple should noe this old song la.. =)

fever '04...

haiz.. sis evelyn wants me to go for fever '04 and there's no way i can back out... she wouldn't let me.. haiz... i am not prepared.. so short notice.. dunnoe why i so kpo show interest. hah.. actually i am interested but i am not willing yet. i got other commitments... rugby, entreprenuer... ar!!!! wad to do.. i'll be gone for at least a week on mission.... guess i'll be posted to east timor... or maybe indonesia... i am not prepared!! how?? i feel soooo.. worried now... trying to lift this up to God.. but i cant get it off my mind.... maybe its God's will.. maybe.... i've been soo away from God till i kinda feel like i'm a hypocrite. i've been praying over it for a long time...

anyway, today was an ok sunday.. spent most of my time doing video.. argH!! now having headache... today, din do much after church, i juz went down to dec's house and watch him play rune scape. den me and jon played little fighter haha... den had some muah chee his mom made. quite nice ar... i think i also want to try make myself..

after some time, went back to church, duty again.. dn today matt buy 7 packet of fries bring up video room. eat until dun need eat dinner liao arz.. haha... den sermon today damn long.. went back down try to back sis evelyn to let me off.. but i think i cant get off the hook this time.. guess i've gtg... 1k plus leh... i heart pain ar.. air flight and all.... haiz..

anyway, this holidays will not be holidays liao ar.. so many things i've got to do... rugby tournaments, rugby camp, entreprenuer comp and trainings, church camp, missions trip, still got sch... man.... holidays will juz be a bunch of cca days... haiz... gonna have lots of rugby training too... preparing for A div and our M1 10s and sentosa touch.. but if i go fever '04, i cant go tournament... unless i rush back on saturday from indo, sunday go comp... i want to play ar!!!!!!!!! quite cramp ar... church camp and fever '04... haiz... wad to do!?

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haiz.. ec, ec, ec... girls sometimes juz dun understand guys... she dunnoe how much i used to love her... of course that'd be this lil part that still cares for her. but she juz blow things up.. haiz.. dun wish for that to happen.. the exp.626 thingy, kinda came out before the lilo thingy.. she din really like that thing.. kinda fits me and lilo in place, so i took it off... i can always change my email. but i din. isn't that more important? hah... but anyway, i think there'll nvr be a me and ec anymore. forever. i might not change my email now, since i feel that there's no need. guess i'll leave it as it is, but it has no meaning anymore. if u love someone, u wont hurt that person. i guess we dun love each other cos we hurt each other. she says she used hu to make me more jealous. hah! u want me to belive. even if u did. u pushed it too far. i was soo damn hurt and filled with fury that i trashed stuff in my room, smahed and bang things out of place... until my parents came in.. i was in my dad's arms.. he was calming me... my parents love me so much... at that point, i realised there wasnt any need for ec, anymore... i hated and i treasued that part of life. the feeling of being dumped.... cos i din have the time for her. gave her all the time to find another. even u want to patch now, its juz too late. i cant accept those things anymore... i really cant...

I feel good!

haha! today i am feeling real happy for no reason. though in the morning, me and esther exchanged msgs, it din really bring my mood down. haha... i spent the day watching cartoons and playing comp. dunnoe why my mother also good mood. haha.. muz be God who is blessing our family haha...

so evening, went out with my family (like first time sia) go out eat dinner... stupid dinner cost soooooo much hah! i can buy so many clothes with all that money but my father also good mood la, so dun mind spending. ya, cos of dinner, i din go edge. anyway, today colleen's birthday. hah! so here goes...

"happy birthday to you!

happy birthday to you!

happy birthday to colleen.....

happy birthday to you!!!!"

ok now in chinese, malay and tamil! sing urselves! hah!

ok, so after dinner, my sis and i decided to get her something. so got her a cake and a lil prezzie haha.... the thingy we gave her was quite cute la, so me and my sis got ourselves one too hee! so i kinda had fun choosing presents. have not done that in a long time.. haha.. last time was buy cake for kailing. actually it kinda feels good to give la.

met dec at lot 1 go his house with matt to celebrate. but... haha.. she not coming home tonight!!! aiya! haha.. nvm la. at least we got to drop off the cake and stuff.. actually want to celebrate on sun but my dad say no good la.. he say pple usually celebrate before birthday or on that day itself. haha...

kk.. overall, today was nice... though going out with my family was a lil wierd and boring initially, it kinda turned out fine la. haha.... lilo's real lucky to be close to her family.. it actually does feel good eating out together and stuff.. haha... so.... that's it for today. nite pple. hope i can sleep tonight.. haha....

finally can update

ok last night din update cos got problem.... haha.. anyway, i had a boring morning that saturday. had training at 4 reached early at abt 2.30.. johnny and some others were there le.. i ate lunch. den got change, 3 o'clock play touch.. haha.. quite fun la... den normal training and stuff took place after sam arrived..

so... after training u was real tired.. haha... went down to clementi with kira and seng go eat and drink haha.. den go home. on my way, i met nigel. so at least got someone accompany me.. hah... reached home, bathe... watch the 9 o'cock show.. quite nice ar... should have watched it from the start...

ok.. so i played games till my eyes were fried at 12 am... went to bed.. cant sleep. so i turned on the radio on my phone and listen.. was recording some songs and saving it in my memory card.. haha... very nice to listen to the late nite show.. haha.. a lot of jc girls who are studying for their A levels called in.. haha... i think they are too stressed.. so i juz listened.. haha nice.. den suddenly, esther msged. kinda quarrelled a lil... all the way till 3 plus am...i couldn't sleep la... drank a lot of water, kept going toilet...

by the last msg about 3+, i decided to try sleep.. so difficult ar... haiz... in the end i also fell asleep... this time, i dream of naruto. haha... the night before, i dreamt of cellular, juz after watching the show. lol! woke up at 10.30 this morning.. sooo tired... den watch cartoons as usual and now plaing comp...

kk i continue watch tv le.. cya.

back from outing!

*yawnz*.. soo tired... one whole day outside playing and spending money.. haha... no gf aso good.. hee.. money can spend for urself. lol! haha... i spent 30 bucks today!! ar!! save until soo xing ku den spend sooo much. anyway, i had lots of fun la.. haha..

went down to PS, meet the rest den oni ah seng there... the rest haven come but they din take long like the other time.. saw sam and miyane with their church frens. haha we dao them. ok, we went up and catch this movie 'Cellular' quite a cool show ar. damn nice haha.. but lack a lil romance haha.... soooo nice.. feel like watching it again haha... it is some action packed show about cell phones. hah! but can tell that it was made quite some time back cos the phone they use, still a lil old fashion haha..

ok... after the show, decided to go play pool. got drenched in the rain.. haiz... MY HAIR!!! haha.... went down to paradigm again but this time, we got table. yay! i played about 4 games oni la.. cos i kept going out to the arcade to play virtual cop.(haha.. i noe old game la but there's no nice games there) played some games wth kelvin haha... fun la..

after some time, kira left us... curfew i guess.. den left kai, josh, kelv seng and i. actually i wanted to come home.. cos i feel like coming online. but they psyco me go, so bo pian la go... anyway, i have no dinner at home... actually aso quite fun la.. but spend sooo much money.... we like carnivors sia... kept eating meat haha.. but nice ar.. the bacon, i bbq until crispy.. ah.... den the thin beef aso very nice.. haha.. dunnoe why so filling ar.. ate a bit oni.. haha... actually not really a bit la.. haha.. den had prawns.. it is nice but i din take too much cos i allergic ar...

i think i'm gonna grow fat...

wah.. the rain and all kinda made the night feel romantic.. aiya.. but got no girls with us.. haha... it'll be a good idea to bring ur gf down to marina for steam boat.. its so.... cool... kinda miss someone.. but nothing i can do now.. it's best if i can juz forget everything and start anew, in school, in church... haiz... dunnoe why i muz keep getting myself into such problems... hah.. but i think it's juz me... i love to love and be loved.. haha... juz miss having someone by my side.. someone i can count on.. hah...

so, soon i went home. dad came down from my uncle's place so picked me up. was sooo damn sleepy... hah.... so... i think that's about all i did for today..

Pissed... but i'm smiling =D

hah.. so difficult to juz plan one outing. haiz.. actually, we wanted to make it all guys outing but u noe, class outing means girls muz come along. so i asked the girls where they want to go. they say marina south. ok so settled. we plan liaoz go marina south. some more i had to psyco the guys go marina south to join the girls.

anyway, before i slept, miyane msged me last night telling me go ice skate. so nvm... change plan ice skate ok set. den u noe wad!? this morning change plan, meet at marina bay den decide wad to do. wah lao! i noe i'm usually the last person complaining about these stuff. but u expect me to wear jeans den go marina and play!? hot la! den if i wear three quarts, u pple say go ice skating how!? i go home ar? haiyo... so i really not happy liao this time.. den they like blame kai. he dun wan skate den nvm la. he say it is ok.

sooooo, i decided talk to kai, we suggest our own plan without the girls la. best like that. not so messy. kai say ok go town. conference call with the rest of the guys den hey like ok go town. den seng said " ok today show girls some attitude" haha i shocked! nvr expect sia.. haha.. so now we plan hao le. go watch movie. so gonna go get ready liaoz...

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No maid = No breakfast, lunch and dinner.

argh!! i soooo hungry ar.. morning no breakfast.. now that my maid has gone home, i dunnoe how to talk to the other maid. haha... no breakfast so i ask my sis go down buy food. haha... yea! shiok. anyway, thatz it bye!

back again...

haiz.. i cant sleep.... dunnoe why.. i juz keep thinking of stuff... haiz... y.. i dunnoe wad to do.... i feel sooo messed up... why always like this... things settle liaoz, den suddenly one msg changes everything.. ar... wad to do... i think i should let things be.. wait a while more.. yeah... wait a while more...

so i spent my time in bed listening to the radio and recorded some of the songs in my hp till it got corrupted.. have to go format it again.. haiz... tml going ice-skating.. sounds fun, but a waste of money.. i guess spending money on enjoying is worth it once a while.. have not skated in a long time too..

i feel like playing the piano or guitar now.. but its like so late liaoz... haiz... dunnoe wad to write le.. i go surf net.

hmm.. i've got short memory now..

i cant remember wad happened today.. i only remember that i woke up late, came to school on time, clean the classroom.... oh yea.. pam and theresa came over to my class.they all were playing with the net ball.. so it kinda looked quite fun so i joined in and played a lil. haha...

wad else happened ar... erm.. came home real early had nothing to do.. play games sleep... wake up, play some more.. nvr watch tv for a long time liaoz.. soooo... oh ya.. esther msged me again. but.... girls are out of the picture now so i'll not start. damn.. i really dunnoe wad to do. i can't even miss a girl.. if i do, pple will say me. like they dun miss like that...

so anyway, trying to settle with the rest on where to go tml. marina south i guess... it's gonna be fun, i think... hah... i feel so bored writing this now, dunnoe why.. i think i'll go take another shower before i sleep. it's sooo damn warm! my body's all sticky.. haiz..

oh yea.. i loved the rain juz now.. i was sleeping and i can hear the thunder and rain drops.. ah... sooooo nice... din feel like waking up.. i wished it rained like that all day... like some fantasy world.. haha... kk. stop here liaoz.

Last days of school!

yay.. tml's the final day at sch.. ao erm.. another slack day for me.. haha.. all my teachers not around, so spent all my time in the canteen. oh ya. got chinese but din go cos i did not realise everyone else had gone for lesson.. so me kira some girls and other guys juz sat at the canteen and chatted.. ah... this is the life.. haha...

so... had lots of things to settle though for the publicity com.. had to print out the title thingy, cut and paste.. wah.. i pei fu huiwen.. she and two others cut so many ar... i one person juz cut 10 letters, i neck ache.. lol! haha... man.. so tiring.. den so windy.. i cut liaoz den keep flying away den muz chase like catching chicken haha... i pon the PW thingy to complete it so that come home can play comp. anyway, carolin came and help me with it.. aisha too.. so i din feel too lonely. thanks girls..

was juz cutting and chatting with ran and carolin.. haha.. nothing to do ar.. kena pang seh by the guys.. haiz... so.. i had nothing much to do after completing it so went home. juz nice, i saw sam so i got i a ride from her mother. haha.. she fetched me all the way to bukit panjang leh!! haha THANK YOU. this meant that i can play games faster haha... the mother damn funny... was at the back with miyane. den talking about miss tan and how she 'tortured' the netball girls.. pity em all.. all got sprain here and there, cuts here and there... now, theresa's beautiful leg got 2 marinated spots on her knees haha.... look like curry chicken haha... she put the prawn medicine thingy *ouch!* damn.. hate that medicine.. my dad always force me put it. sooooo pain ar!!!

haha.. anyway, i go plauy games liaoz.. cya!

3 day drama..

man.. it's gona be a 3 drama from today to wednesday.. a drama showing millenians coping with their exam results.. laugther, cries, screams, relief... as 04S3, we've broken the JI curse of having the most no. of retainees. when i heard all the boys were promoted, i damn happy ar! the knights of the round won't be splitted up! haha.. cool!

anyway, today was a real tiring day cos yesterday i slept late.. playing MS till 1 am.. had like first 4 periods of free time.. walked around school... see people laughing, crying... haiz... wad a happy yet sad sight.. labina's eyes were all swollen... haiz... so sad.. my mom msged me checking how i did. told her i pass everything except maths and chinese... she soo happy ar... she din even cared if i pon school or not. hah! my chinese compo got 21 upon 35 leh!!!! *shocked!* passed my G.P too and guess wad, i got 2 digits for maths!!!! i got 10! hahahahaha...

we were so bored in school that we tried to run away from school once and guess wad... we got CAUGHT! darn.... nvm... went back to school.. walk around somemore den try again. haha.. this time success! lol! haha.. reached home like 12 and my mom was like why come home so early.. haha...

i guess i'm causing problems for lilo... guess i'd better leave her alone... dun wanna make her angry or upset with me.... haiya.. my fault la... should not even say anything about her when it hit me.. should have kept it to myself. now i won't even say how i feel about any girls haha... juz in case la... casued enough problems.. juz re-settled problems with esther... now better solve lilo's problem... best, to let her be...

i miss that friday at sentosa... man, it was sooo nice... dun want that day to pass ar.. hope that we can ask those cedar girls out someday go play haha... they quite fun la.. haha... sooo... i need to go school tml liaoz.. din want to go. but i have e-club meeting and i have to finish up the work for the publicity thingy.. huiwen has helped a lot.. thanks girl!

i guess that's about it for today hope P.E.'s fun tmr.. babye!

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oh yea! forgot something! remember the jessica?? haha.. guess wad!! theresa noe her! last time they same ballet class and primary school!! aaaaaaaaaaa!!! cool! haha... lol.. cant forget those rosy cheeks. lol!

tml's judgement day results...

cant remember much that happened today.. but it was a fine day. had lotsa fun.. chatting about funny stuff that happened in sch, video duty.. played badminton.... haiya.. a lot of things ar.. haha.. lazy to state..

anyway.. tomorrow's gonna be the results of our promos.. really worried... hope i'd do fine.. man.. gonna miss those pple who are staying back.. especially if their part of the 7 knights of the round.. hah.... i'm gonna leave all up to God and see wad he has installed for me..

oh yea.. have a good news!! my grandma, she.. became a christian today!! great testimony ya! yeah! prayed for her and my grandfather many years ago during youth camp. i remember that after the youth camp, i came home and my mom told me that my grandparents decided to destroy all their budhist idols for no reason! it muz have been God for sure! den soon, my grandpa was leaving for perth. had a heart attack on the airplane. however, my mom prayed for save journey mercies before that and guess wad, the doctors cannot believe my grandpa survived! in perth, they did a bypass for him. they were wondering how he survived. told us he'll live for only half a year. guess wad, my mother prayed for him day and night and he lived 8 years! now he's gone.. but he's the greatest testimony! God is good!

wah.. now my grandma converted.. all because of a small prayer 5 years ago... thank God i went for that camp... changed my whole family's life.. now.. i'm a bad christian... i'm real sorry.. i am trying to change.. gonna be like last time.. wanna be powerful in prayer.. wanna feel the presence of God in my life like that time during encounter.. i felt it move through my body into my hands and into sean... man.. it's good to be used by God... i love Him....

i really want to be like last time.. how i prayed every night for all my friends.. i remember how much i loved the muslims though they hated me talking about God, Jesus, bible... i still loved them.. they are really nice pple. and i want them to have the chance to get ot know God. man.. i used to love the pple around me sooo much.. dunnoe y am i not like that anymore..

anyway, it is gonna take time.. now that i dun have esther anymore, i think i'll be able to concentrate on God. esther, i am not blaming u. but u noe, we spent our time together not as good christians... we should be older and more mature so that we know wad we are doing.. so... i'm gonna continue watching naruto. see u guys! all the best tml!