ok.. so today after church, i was thinking if i should go for class or not... actually, my mind was made up la.. i want to go cut hair so dun go class.. haha.. in the end, after staying in the nursery room for like 2hrs, chatting with some youths, my decision was to go home.. haha...

actually, i need to take my bible from video room la.. but i din wan to risk getting caught so i asked joash to help me and he din wan to!! so i bo pian juz go home den later tell fabian help me. as i was walking, the rain began to drizzle a lil.. den as i walk somemore, many things went running through my mind.

half of me, wants to go back for class.

so i was near the second bus stop near keat hong market. i was juz standing in the rain staring at the church building and started thinking. things that ran through my mind: class is more impt, my bible's in church, "letting my 'motivator' down", i have to retake, God should be first priority, my frens... haha... i think too much

i noe!

ok.. i turned and jogged all the way back. so i was in kind of quite a mess.. my hair and all.. haha... wet, cold ar!!! hahaha...

i thank God i went for class.. hee.. =D got 2 reasons why la.. but... hee.... juz for me to know. ha!

after class, i wanted to go for evening but... i was really uncomfortable ar.. and my hair, a mess! haha.. maybe i'll cut it next week la... juz have to think of a new hairstyle for ths week.. ha..

okok... so i'll go do some stuff now. bye.

Life's juz like this. accept the it the way it is..

not gonna blog depressing stuff sooo....

anyway, i guess i'm gonna start afresh. wadz in the past is in the past. so guys help me k! if i do something wrong, stop me! if i'm not studying, push me! ( there's still mo pushing ha...)

and i guess starting afresh means a lot of things. so ya. let's see how things go.

time for devotion and bed.. nite!

Sleeping Disorders?

haha.. i dunnoe wad's with meman.. haha... for the past few days, i slept almost immediately after i came home. den i'll like wake up in the middle of no where and i either cant sleep , or go back to sleep. both ways, i stil cant wake up at 6.30!!! haha... today, however, i woke up at 6.45 after sleeping at 12am last night!! hahaha...

man.. i think my sleeping's really affecting my school... i juz cant concentrate... especially chem! now i dunnoe wad is going on! darn! argh!!! hmmm.... i'm still trying to listen though.. at the rate i'm going, i might as well retain.. ha.... is it cos i've got no motivation? maybe i dunnoe the motive of why i'm studying.. haha... or maybe, i juz need a break from school and get enough rest. BUT! i've beome too acustomed to breaks and now i'm sick of school! haha.. contridicting ya!

crap.

i shall go play maple and see if i can sleep later.. hee.. =D

GP essay: Relationships are painful, discuss.

haha.. ok the title's crap but it's regarding what i want to talk about today... why? cos i saw something, another thing happened, and cos ec msged me. ok. what i saw: ok.. so i saw this guy today... dun wan to state name la.. but the whole school noe's him (clue) ok... so as his ex was walking by, i could see tt he was distracted... tears were juz in his eyes but he managed to conceal it well... i knew who initiated it from his expression...

den another thing tt happened was similar to mine... cos of a change in environment, change in lifestyle... the opposite is juz not used to it... doesnt this sound soooo familiar? wasn't it the reason why ec felt neglected? i din have time for her... i mean.. to the first guy, wo men shi guo lai ren... i understand perfectly how u feel... 2 yrs of experience has made understand a lot of things.. i used to tear whenever she passed by me... but no point man.. i cant trust even her now.. maybe i'm juz still very scared... afraid... i dunnoe... i rather juz be with myself sometimes... pour out my problems to myself...

u noe, i am not tt sort like what some of u guys think, i'm not the always changing type. there are some which are u noe, juz..... u noe, like juz admire but not like kind of thing... and i dun over react k pam! is u all disturb me and u noe, i easily pai seh one lor! at least theresa understands! haha.. i juz like to say it out so u guys may think like.. haha.. i dunnoe la... but i really am a faithful person... i noe.. i juz like to talk about other girls sometimes.. maybe cos i dun do all these in the past and u guys are not used to it.. haha.. i'm a free man now k. ha... and i'm not tt bad la... compared to the rest! (right!? u all are especially those 2 ahem! hahahahaha) remember those times i was with ec? i could not even be bothered about other girls. now my life's soo different. haiz...

i'm juz listening to the song on ec's blog. it's nice... brings back lots of sad memories... but i like this song... it's like a song for a love that never meant to be kind of thing... u guys can trust me on my judgement whenever it comes to relationship k. i noe how u 2 feel but u've gotta trust me.. dun let such small stuff affect u.. haha.. though there's some older one's tt dun like taking advice from younger pple. haha... they think they are mature enough.. hahaha WADEVER! hahaha... lets see... lets see... betcha image is always important hee!

an for crying out loud!! i dun attract guys and i'm not gay!! hahaha... i'm juz frenly to everyone. how would i know if tt person's gay or not! but maybe some of my actions are really silly sissy hahahaha... cos i always imitate some girls to make fun of them ar.. den end up i keep doing it ahahaha!! so i'll stop disturbing them ha! (who ask them la.. always do stupid actions tt make me want to laugh and disturb them. bet some of u guys also cant resist but make fun of em ahahahaha!!)

starting?

ha.. dunnoe if i'm starting to get interested in maths or wad!? cos i was like a bit more willing to listen today. man.. every thursday is the triple maths period and it never fails to knock me out. today, though i was more willing to pay attention, i was knocked out by the third period. haha... i could not stand it!!! but it's a good start right? i'm listening and asking questions... haha.. we quite bad ar.. always bully saw.... saw very cute ar. haha..

hate physics pract man!~ it's sooo boring.. dunnoe wad i'm gonna do for SPA... dunnoe if i can even finish the paper. lol! haha... boring!~ but today ok la.. still had a bit of fun disturbing ray and all.. haha.. reminded me of the song...

The MI Do-Re-Mi (edited)

`Do a deer, euphemia's deer.~

`Re i spotted Raynuka!~

`Mi, oh dear! i ate Miyane!~(noodles)

`Fa, i met faezah..~

`So i went to kelvin,~

`La, wo la ta de tou fa~ (i pull his hair)

`Ti, wo yi jiao ti xia qu~ (i kick him down)

And that would bring........ us...... back...... to...... Do!

haha.. silly but cool right! haha... kk.. so i'll go to sleep now... my brains dying.. haha...

Recapping Yesterday

ok it's 3.07 in the morning! i slept right after i came home.. so i din do any work or anything. plan to do a bit later i think.. haha....

ok, before i begin, juz a lil something for u guys.. haha...

hee... =D cute right!! mo drew it and i did the shading... wah la! a beautiful portrait of maple's thief!

okok... so yesterday started off with this biochip thingy. u noe, the end of days kind of thing. yea.... fast man... the mark of the beast and all... den Luke Chen, sibei extra sia! during Q/A session he was like "i'm a christian for like 30 yrs already. this issue to christians is juz a matter of privacy." ya right! u wad? go to church sleep one ar!? or u from some cult!? jerk! so i shouted "u dunnoe anything la! go sit down." ahaha.... extra! haha. pam was like.. "hey gabe.. haha.."

man. now it feels so different with pam after she left our church.. ha.... like not so close liaoz.. man... we're like frens like since the beginning of time.. ha!

so had fun touch in the evening. super fun sia! 2 of my guys called and said they wanted to play last min! so i was like WTH! haha... no time to teach ma.. all the other teams already practice since the day before. so they were like at the basketball caourt picking pple.. haha.. den they say nvm la, juz play. haha... cool dudes i like this kind of guys! so i gave them a 15-20min training. i was so called 'coaching' em la.. haha... and i taught them juz 2 tactics they need. seriously. it's a noobie game.. dun need scissors, loop and all. hahahahaha... i taught them two commit and pass technique in which they used to score 3 tries against their first opponent! woo hoo i'm soo proud of em... ok... the game results was. 1st game, we win 3-0, 2nd lose 1-0, 3rd lose 1-0, and finally win 2-0.

haha... for the last game i juz told them play a relexed game so they were like ok lor... haha.. end up 2-0 den they regret sia... cos the last few games ar... i dunnoe wad they were doing la! haha.. tottaly different from the first game. they were like clumping up and not defending properly. but well done guys! u guys came in 3rd with 20 mins of training! so i think u guys rock!

haha moral-think noobie play noobie! actually, they used only 1 technique i taught them to score all 5 tries! haha... cos the other was a dummy which they did not use... haha... basic commit passes... haha...

I Do I Do

had my ups and downs for today.. happy with lots of stuff and pissed with some too... but! i've put tt behind already and had lots of fun after sch!! ahahahaha!!

ok.. so me and kelvin planned to go westmall today after sch. thank God no training or wad. hah... we wanted to juz buy some naruto merchandize and eat nachos. so we walked up to the theatre area and we ended up watching a movie. so i was like feeling happy at tt point of time so i felt like watching something funny to make me even more happier.. haha! so we watched 'I Do I Do' haha... very funny!! haha...

it's quite a cool show. i give it a 4.5/5 haha.. it's soo silly too! haha... "A for Ang mo tan, B for Bua duku, C for C-kway!!(watermelon)" ahahahahaha!!! "D for D24!" hahaha... so silly... reminded me of things like Labbit, Ladio... haha.... so silly...

ah.. had lots of fun la... but i in the end had to pang seh kelvin cos my mom today rented a car so she came over and picked me up. haha.. sorry kelv!! i really wanted to stay longer... =)

ok.. so i can finally play maple too!! yea!! haha.. okok.. i have to go back and study. cya!

... or is it juz me?? (edited)

man.. last night i juz could not sleep cos there're many things on my mind.. i was thinking of someone too.. and i really had something to say to this person and i could not contain it.. and so i said it out.. but not to tt person... ( btw, it's not ec i'm thinking of... sometime's i only would like to see her.. but, i'm over ec already..)

man.. i dunnoe what's with me... haha.. i juz feel like i wanna say it out.. i wanna talk to tt person.. but i cant.. u guys noe me la.. gutless and all.. haha... i even told God about it!!

**************************************

btw! can anyone remember anything i did tt may seem obscene on valentine's!? ahah... i soooo dunnoe what miss low's talking about. but she's disturbing me over tt!! ahh!!! what did i do!? haha... gonna pester her till she tells me!!! ahahahahahaha!!! *wonders*

ok... haha.. i've deleted everything i juz typed juz now. so for those who din get to read it.. haha.. too bad! haha.. i felt tt it was too depressing. so let's talk about miss low! haha... she's juz this really sweet teacher in which almost every guy would fall for at first sight ahahahahahahaha!!

ok.. so i was suppose to look for her to get my money from the last competition.. so i was juz joking with kelvin about me looking for her to ask her out.. haha... so i juz turned around and she walked out from the general office. *oOo..* what coincidence! hahahaha... so i was like talking to her and asking her about the money when kelvin as in STUPID KELVIN!!! had to say "i tot u were gonna ask her out on a date!?" !!!! ahhh!!!!!!! stupid!!!!!!!! ahhh!!!!!!! haha.... but miss low is very kind and nice. so i believe she did not mind it. den i walked out and mr saw, had to disturb me too!! ah!!!!! he said, "orh.. so is tt miss low ar.." haha... he's soo cute man.. i lou mr saw.. haha.. ( lou=love as how raynuka says it haha...) he knew about it cos i was telling him even if miss low were to teach me maths, i'd fall asleep... cos i cant stand maths! but i've got some encouragement from my friends!! thx guys!!

ok. so i went out and i met zhida.. haha... so he asked me if i had went to see miss low so i said yes. den i asked him if he did. and he also said yes.. he said yes, i asked her out! !!!! haha.. y everyone can only think of asking her out!? haha... ( as i am speaking, i juz witnessed an accident at my window.. car knocked a bike.... and they're like quarreling...)

ok.. so now kelvin and his stupid "unleash her desire to kiss me!" ahahaha.. tt's dumb k! i really want to sabo u ar! cos we kinda met tt person at west mall.. haha... apparently, he's dying for a kiss from her! hahahahahaha!!!! angel also know!! cos she's with me!! haha... we were out at westmall shopping and the 'comics' shop has soo many cool naruto stuff!! oOo.... cool!!!

anyway, enough for today. ahaha... i'm juz feeling super happy for some reason. and it's a secret! ahahahaha!!! wheee!!!! ahahahaha...

burn burn burn burn!!

ow ow ow ow ow ow.... haha.. my sun burns hurt man... but thank God for good weather today at sentosa... when my OG mates pulled me into the sea, the sun was hidden... haha.. so i was protected... so i'm still ok.. haha...

ok. suppose to go back to church for lessons... but it took me more time to leave sentosa then i expected.. so i was super late, and i decided to drop by my grandma's place for a nap.... ah.... nice sleep... had a nice dream too but i cant remember...

anyway, i really had lots of fun today... should have juz stayed on since i was going to be late.. want to spend these last few days of the first 3 months with em... haha.. i also dunnoe wad i should do now... i really wonder if i should stay on or what... i need my A level cert ar... now without maths and chinese.. what am i gonna do!?!?!? ...

today's sunday... sooo fast.... i dunnoe why but i love saturdays the most.. wake up in the morning... the sun's shining sooo beautifully, cartoon's on kid's central... comp in the afternoon.... edge, and dinner. ahh... the most perfect day... but school's starting tml... i'm feeling wierd.. uncomfortable man.... i dunnoe la.. starting to dislike school....

gonna go have my quiet time le.. so see you pple tml!

what a great day.. today.

today's sucha great day.. i dunnoe why.. i juz feels good to be with my friends and at the super radical edge where everything there's soo cool. even the preacher. haha... today's sermon was super and i mean super duper funny! and it was super good too... man.. we have to notice this reality of a God who's living in us and who has granted us eternal life.. His way for us is always the best so pray and seek Him and u'll never fail in life.

ok.. so before edge, i went swimming. ar... so shiok ar.. but i swam a lil too long... about 2 and a half hours.. man.... i'm burnt. super burnt... *ow ow ow* tml i still have to go sentosa... and most probably be burnt some more.. muz control myself... cannot stay out too long... but i've got plans already. tml will be a great day! God will still be amongst us though i'm not at church.. haha...

man.. i'm really like a lobster and it hurts!!! anyway, today's a great day cos... i dunnoe, i saw some pple which kinda made my day.. also, at the edge, i am juz enjoying the presence of God and i was like sooo keen to learn more... and my worries, problems, everything were all gone.. it juz felt great... ahh.... i feel sooo loved and like i am around all my friends... cool...

soo... cant wait for tml... after sentosa, i still have to head back for class... so hope i make it back on time and i really pray that it'll be a great day. hope i can accomplish what i want to do and hope tt it caqn be done as an OG...

ok.. now i juz want to post all the photos for somebody and those who cannot catch the fast moving pictures.. haha.. =D

yesterday....

ok... so yesterday after trainin, i had to go do the mission booth stuff... at least i manage to go home and bathe first.. so i went to CCK building to go help out. bro stanely came like 10+ so we had to stay back till like quite late ar... i stayed till about 12+ but it was fun la!! haha... den was doing this editing of testimonies thingy.. haha... it's like sooo funny and so wierd u dunnoe whether u want to laugh or cry as u read em.. it's super broken english and spelling was super funny too.. have to play guessing game haha...

e.g (what they were trying to spell) decuple, disable - (correct spelling) disciple
Culvry - Calvary
(what they wrote) i want like to..... - (what they really meant) i would like to...

haha.. so it was quite fun la... after tt, i stayed over at dec's place.. cos it was real late... so i woke up 5.30 this morning and came home. slept till like 9+ this morning den... watch cartoons!! hahaha....

ok... so nothing much happened yesterday.. haha... except our physical conditioning for rugby which was quite a killer... haha... actually, i din expect u guys to notice that for the 2nd, 3rd and 4th rounds, i was sprinting full power.. haha... if u guys notice, my head was like down and i did not blink my eye.. it's cos i was focusing and motivating myself... so i could not feel that "tiredness" (but actually i super tired la.. haha..) so i was like almost vomitting after the 4th run... haha...

den i loved dinner at BK. $2.95 only!! haha... cheap meal man.. love it.. but i guess tt's about my day la.. still trying to focus on school work... always feeling very latargic and bored.. muz try to sleep early these days.. i am having like 6hrs sleep each day which is an hr and a half shorter den my normal sleeping time.. so muz sleep early le.. if not my make up sleeping sessions will happen during maths.. haha...

kk.. so i'll be going swimming soon so see u guys!

Maths = snorezz....

haha.. i juz dislike maths a lot man.. maths lesson to me is juz some slack lesson to relax and all haha.. i cant stand listening to even 10mins of it... i'll fall asleep even if miss low's the teacher... the topic juz puts me to sleep *pip!* man... really thx to moses and raynuka who's always motivating me to study maths.. ha! back rubs, silly stuffs and all haha... thanks guys! maths = major brain killing therapy. haha...

ok.. so today i dropped by PJC today cos i met up with grace and.. erm.. i sooo forgot his name.. arghh!!! haha.. i know i know his name but i juz cant remember.. hee... =D sorry dude! i went for a short orientiering round PJ.. haha.. this guy adrain i think, brought us round his school.. saw yushin haha.. tot maybe i could spy on their rugby team or something.. hee!! it's a really nice school man... too bad i din get in ar... haha...

really had a nice walk round... enjoyed myself.. actually i was suppose to go straight home and drop by CCK building and help angel with the mission booth.. but came home real late la.. had to walk so far out from PJ.. haha... and i was like sooo tired already... thank God she finished the banner and so i din need to go down.. but tml, i'd go down to help finish the rest. thanks angel!!

ok. so i'm gonna stop here.. wanna put a short video on.. haha.. starting not so nice la.. the ending den got more action.. hee... enjoy!

home sweet home..

man.. i juz love home.. i am soo busy these days i dun have much time at home.. school sux! we've got to stay back till so late everyday.. or should i say i have to stay back till so late.. haiz...... i sooo tired, i juz sit at the comp or lie in bed and juz rest.. i really cant be bothered to push myself anymore to study or do my homework... or maybe it's juz cos i'm not motivated...

i really miss.... erm.. u noe.. those times... life's nice but there's no one to go through my pains and troubles with me.. ha... i am tired of my everyday life.. i wish for a change.. change in everything.. arh... i'm like sooo tired each and everyday and i've got task and stuff i've yet to complete.. haha.. i've got pple to face, things to do, stuff to work on... ar.... i'm feeling soo sick man...

anyway, had friendlies today.. both draw... played NYJC and SRJC... ok. i played the NY one.. and it was really cool and fun... i really cant stop playing man.. i can juz go on and on.. haha.. have always wanted to play SR, but nvr had the chance.. ha... i'd rather forfeit my NY game and play SR.. hee... ok.. so the only thing i'm proud of myself is that i aint scared of big guys no more... though pple still say i look scared.. haha.. let em say all they want. i noe how i feel! ha!! next time i juz have to bring him down to show them. man.. i was like running up at him. den i hit him and grabbed him den in my mind was like YEAH!!! SHIOK AR!!! next moment, *BAM!* his knee hit my eye.. and i say bye bye.. haha... (it rhymes..) kena knocked over.. man... he's like sooo round and big, i only felt his butt and could not reach my hands to lock.. ahould have juz grabbed wad ever i could and not let go.. maybe the impact of him hitting me, and me flying back would bring him down.. haha.. but no matter... i still hit him at full speed.. haha.. it feels good man!! but.. now i have a swollen eye.. ha.... and that headache from my nose injury is juz disturbing me now... ar.. feel like sleeping.. but chem assignment....

ok.. so got the ball back to do some practices, juz tossing around and reflecting by staring at the ball haha... now my new boots a a lil more seasoned and my foot did not hurt much today.. so.. ya.. i think i should go orh orh... i feeling hot all around my body.. haha.. best to sleep with aircon.. hee...

what God has done for me!!

haha.. these few weeks ever since all my problems began, live's been real hectic.. it's like a total mess man.. but God has been bringing me through situations and still guiding me on.. and i'm real happy to have Him in my life... =D

hmmm.. i cant think of all my problems now cos i juz woke up from my 4 hour sleep but i've been in the lion's den and juz like in the story, God shutted the lion's mouth and proteted daniel.

with all my laziness and procrastiniating, i'm also able to get through my days with no serious punishment or anything.. haha... i've escaped sooo many times.. hee.. =D also, MY shoe!! man.. i was praying like crazy last night hoping to find it today.. and i found it only in the afternoon when out of nowhere, aisha found it!! i was like looking all over the place!!! thank God!!

still got a lot more la... haha.. but i juz cant remember... and now, i need help for planning.. man... there's soo many things that i need to get planned out.. i'm not talking about school but more of my life.. i still dunnoe wad to do for the future; for these few days, for the coming years...

okok.. so i'm going to sleep soon after dinner... man.. i'm still very tired... my dad was like waking me up like crazy cos he's worried i cant go back to sleep!!! haha... but i'm still very tired la.. muz rest too.. tml i want to be refreshed and play our match!!

Valentine's day!! (edited)

haha.. ok.. so today is valentine.. haha... finally got the prezzie thingys settled and over with.. haha... man.. i was like cracking my head last night at 7-11 till late at night... so i could not wake up this morning!! haha..

ok.. so juz wanna say thanks for all the gifts... ha... was quite shock too... haha... ok la.. let's say a pleasant surprise.. haha.. this morning when i reached school, the first prezzie i got was on my table from some annonymous person which akira was suppose to show me who.. haha.. *curious* thanks for the flower!! den there's this yr 1 gal.. haha.. she gave me this lil bag with another bag in it.. haha.. so... kinda checked it out later in the day and guess wad? haha.. it was a box of chocalates from Godiva! haha.... seriously i din noe what it is until the rest told me.. haha... man.. it looked real classy.. ahah... i was sleepy in the morning so i was quite blur when i recieved it.. haha... i feel very bad, cos i dunnoe la.. maybe i was rude?? but i like dunnoe leh... later make pple sad.. haha... but i appreciate the chocolates k!! i also cant bear to touch it. haha... oh yea... it's from this person erm... (i dunnoe if should mention name leh.. later she not happy.. haha..) but thanks to u 'R' haha...

hmmm... den went for assembly and adlina passed me this really sweet towel.. haha.. there's a letter'g' on it.. cool.. haha... i like it a lot! haha... thanks girl! it's so sweet of u haha... and she sewed it herself k! it's soo cool! den break was when we started exchanging prezzies!! haha.. i got a quiksilver pencil box from lay kuen (my angel).. -oh ya!! from moses as well!! they share. i forgot to say.. haha.. thnx!!- haha.. thanks!! i love the pencil box!! but so white, den i scared i dirty it.. haha... so i made this tissue rose for her.. haha.. and it was the nicest i've ever made!!! haha.. at least she likes it la.. i think.. hee... but i like it a lot.. man.. the rose was soo beautiful!! cant belive i did it!! haha...

went over to S2 and they were like giving out liaoz.. haha.. so i brought my hersheys chocolates over and it was the same as what liana got for them too haha!! but we exchanged gifts and it was soo fun and nice.. nvr really had a valentine's like this ha!! so... i got this flower and card from lays, cookies from thulasi and joanne and erm... a loli from raynuka, sweets from gaya! still got who ar?? i hope i din leave out anyone. haha.. thanks to all of u!! i really appreciate everything! i had a really fun day today.

the only thing tt made me sad was something tt happened before i was down for training.. haiz... kinda hurts me to know what happen man... hey dude... hope u feeling better and what ever the problem is, i hope it's ok and u're feeling fine... man.. we are a team! why hurt each other... i juz hope things would be cool.. so anyway, it's really late.. i'm sleepy, i've not done my chem assignment and i'm sooo screwed... argh!! i dun feel like going school again.. haha....

Valentine's eve...

ha.. ok.. i'm finally back from my wonderful dinner... went out with the guys... lazy to type who la.. haha.. we were at hard rock cafe.. haha... so there like soooo many ang moh's there, crazy over our girls.. ha! but they were kind of irritating too... but some were not soo bad la.. only that crazy drunked.. ha! cant even wink good bye! LOSER! he was like going depressed over being rejected by one of the girls... (dun wan to say name or wad la.. haha...) but girl, u're hot! haha.... two of the others even had a free drink of martini is it?? i dunnoe what it was, but it was cool.. haha... there's even fire on it! cool huh.. free drinks man... why no ang moh auntie buy me drink ahahahahahahaha!!!

ok la.. i had nachos there!!!!!!!! wah!! wonderful!!!! me and ahwei share... wahahahaha!!! shiok ar!!! so power!! got that spicy thing too.. look like green chili.. and it's damn hot!! haha.. ah wei popped in a damn big piece thinking tt it was juz a lil spicy. lol!!! haha... den i had steak... hee..... nice.. *yum yum*

after tt, i learned to make tissue paper rose from ah wei.. cool... i ta pao three sets of tissue from HRC go make flower.. hee... i had soo much fun.. till i forgot to buy valentine prezzie!!! tml need to exchange ar... but i got it settled already!! wuahahahahaha!! and also, i was spending my time, squatting at 7-11 thinking of what to buy for the rest of my friends man... in the end, i grabbed a whole bunch of .... (secret) and juz dumped it at the cashier lol!! and i was charged 50 cents cheaper per piece!! haha...

oh ya.. juz realised something about the dumbest things anyone can notice. haha... cos i was stoning on my way home and it happened to me 4 times.. i was juz staring into blank space cos i was soo tired, i was like a zombie haha... den as i stare, i somehow ended up staring there. okok the boobs... den each of the four of them would look down and see why i was staring!! lol!! i was sooo embarrassed man.. after the fourth lady, i juz closed my eyes throught the whole journey.. even old lady too leh!!! she thought i staring at her there!! wah lao.... so disgusting... and there's this other thing i did twice and the same thing happened. whenever i touch my collar, only pple on my sides would be soo curious to actually turn and see why i was touching my collar!! haha.. i was like holding them together la.. haha... especially the ladies, they would turn their heads 180 juz to see, the guys, they juz tilt their heads.. haha.. so kpo for wad! hahaha...

anyway, i was like a drunked.. totally dead and knocked out.. haha.. when i got up to alight, i was swaying left and right.. haha.. was quite embarrassing cos i hit a pole on the LRT!! haha.. i was like blur tiao.. haha... den when i was going up in the lift, i wanted to press the close dorr button but i pressed the bell!! haha.. den as i was walking home, i was swaying so much, i spilled the drink all over, and i cant believe i am having soo much enthusiasm to type my blog.. haha.. actually i cant wait to finish typing this. so i'll stop here and go to sleep!! haha.. nitez!

tml got school....

haiz.. tml school reopens.. sianz... haha.. maybe i should be more optimistic and think of the nice things tt could happen... but i'm still stressed. cos i still did not do my chem homework!! argh!!! i'm sooo lazy.. haha... i keep procrastinating.. haha... zzzzzz....

anyway, juz back from church and i've bought my new pair of boots too... hmmm.. it's a silverish white predator.. though i wanted the nike mercurial or something.. haha... nvm la.. still can change cos i haven use.. see how la.... i like not fit to wear whitish colour boots... the nike one was dark shiny greyish... very soft and nice haha...

anyway, will be going out soon... going for dinner... sooo... wont be able to do my work tonight cos i think i'll be back home late... and i'm sooo sleepy now.. *yawn* man.... school starts tml ar!!

Edge ROCKS!

man.. the new songs the edge have now is getting cooler and cooler man... every single week i juz stand in front listening to all the jamming and the sermon and regreting for not bringing my friends along. man now the edge is soo cool and R.A.D.I.C.A.L!!! man edge R.O.C.K.S!!! must bring friends!!! i muz remember!!! gonna call as many pple as possible to go with me the next time round!! must try even if i dun have hope!!

man... the new songs today are like sooo cool but cos they were new, we in noe what to do.. haha.. so we were a little dead.. no jumpin and all... but the next week, it's gonna hot!!! the edge is SO HOT IT"LL BURN UR SOCKS.. TOO!!!! (not only school tt is...) which reminds me.. i think i should faster get the toilet rolls thingy settled asap!

COME TO THE EDGE!!!

Enigma...

hmmm... i belive most of u guys heard of enigma?? i'm not really sure what it means... but i like some of their music. there's even a 'horror' movie named enigma (i think..) it's about roman catholic... but the show seemed demonic... dunnoe about these songs i heard.. ha.... maybe those lit students will know what it is.. something to do with the germans i think...

gonna play 2 enigma songs over these few days.. juz listen to them.. it's nice.. but i dunnoe whether it's good to listen to them or not... these are some what fantasy songs... i dunnoe la.. some songs seemed scary... but some are okok la... but all like slow slow one... some with latin i think... wonder what those sang in latin means.. i wont be playing those songs that are in latin one cos i dunnoe what they mean.. cos it sounds scary too... so dun wan to give u pple nightmares haha...

anyway, if anyone knows something about enigma pls tell me.. i want to know!! drop me a comment or tag me.

enough Ang Baos!!

haha... tired of collecting hong baos already.. (though a lot of money ar.. but lazY!) ha... i'm getting bored of collecting ang baos den sit there for like 2,3 hrs do nothing!! haha... at least today not soo boring la.. but the day went by real fast... i like wake up, game, den go dec's house...

wah.. i had no appetite ar.. but i was juz snacking all the way haha... ate the mango cheese cake which colleen sacrificed a bottle of soya sauce to save the cake.. ha... the poor thing had to clean the floor... anyway, the cake was SUPERB! *yum yum* den we were like playing mah jong. haha... very fun ar.. i juz learn. after the rest left, den left my sis, col, dec and i. we go the master bed room and play haha... soo funny ar.. a lot of silly things happened. but it was sooo fun! i want to be a mahjong master!! ahahaha... but i christian ar... haha.. so if play for fun, no betting, CALL ME!!! haha... had a hell lot of fun at uncle boyle's house.. man.. din feel like going off haha...

soon, had to go.. man.. reluctant to ar... but anyway, dropped by my dad's boss' place for dinner... again, i din eat anything much.. no appetite ar... so had some sushi and clams.. haha... nice! den my dad say only stay a while. in the end, we stayed there for hours! ar!!!! but i got to play the X-Box a lil la.. played mechassult.. haha... fun... oh yea! the this lady which came with her damn snobbish boyfren.. man.. she's hot! ok la... more of very very pretty den hot la.. haha.. she's a junior, (the one in new zealand, formaly from CCC... erm.. her bdae is one day after mine!! haha..)miss low and carrie chong mix.. woah.. i jealous ar.. like the perfect girl sia... haha... my dream girl.. aww... even my parents were saying she's real pretty. too bad her BF aint cool. haha... den my mom, sis and i were like seeing how tall she is.. man... she's like a model!! woooo... she's about 5cm taller den me.. and her BF, shorter den her!! hahahaha... pathetic.. maybe she goes after his money or something... or matchmake... i juz cant believe he fact that their together!! ahahaha.... man... i'm being so mean... haha... kk... sorry God!! forgive me!

left the place come straight home and rest liaoz! feel like counting how much i've collected ar.. haha..

Chinese New Year...... EVE!

yay!! finally my one week break has arrived!! woohaa!!! gonna go fishing this friday i think.. unless there's plan. hmmm... Sunday gonna go out with my the S2 pple.... still got wad ar? i dunnoe la! but it's a jammed packed week and i'm sooo excited! hahaha.... hope these days are gonna be fun and cool. all u pple enjoy urselves k!!!!!!!

H.A.P.P.Y.C.H.I.N.E.S.E.N.E.W.Y.E.A.R.!.!.!

critical thinking..

haha.. talking about critical thinking i remembered what miss Low *aww...* said. she said something about "what you think of yourselve is what you ar." "many people become victims of their own thoughts." man.. it's like a very meaningful lesson for HT today haha.. thanks miss Low!! *aww...* (heard miss low's got 3 sisters! *oOo...* ahahahah!!)

ok so what ever i was thinking last noght has made me my own victim.. ha... i become depressed for nothing lol! miss lee's homework's due NEXT WEEK!!! ahahahahaha.... silly me.. haha...

ok i'm still trying to find that song for u joanne, but still cannot find la.. haha... guess u'll juz have to hear it out from my own mouth. haha.... LIVE! lol! but anyway, here's another song instead hee.. (feel so DJ like now.. haha..) so hope you'll enjoy it! (muz be cos i listen a lot to carrie Chong!! haha... like what's with me and the Chong family lol!)

-DJ Gabby signing off!

juz my thoughts.. (edited)

sometimes, i dunnoe why the wolrd has to be a sad and painful place to some. i feel pain for em.. maybe cos now, i'm also feeling sad and depressed.. ha... i'm like listening to mocking bird, and it kinda hit me... "why does eminem come out with songs about family all the time?" not juz family... but broken family.. i juz feel sad man.... nice songs but it juz hurts to know that there are pple out there living in a broken family.

i'll juz play this mocking bird song for a day cos it is a really nice yet sad song... has only one bad word in it though i initially thought there was none. ha... i dunnoe much about eminem, but i love my life and i treasure it. hope everyone of u do too...

*************************

after some thoughts, i kinda realise why i'm feeling down and a lil depressed.. ha... it's juz some problems that i have... guess it's cos i've not finish most of my homework and school's tml... also there's gonna be P.E... cant believe i'm dreading it! haha...

also, there's this little problem.. i guess i am disappointed with what i did which makes me sad.. i did this bad lil thing which is like soooo insignificant, and no one would ever know what i did... it's nothing that bad, but i dun like myself doing it. i juz got caught off... it's like till after i did that bad thing den i was like, i feel tt i've let all those i love down... God too... i feel sad.. maybe this depressing feeling i feel is cos i hope for an assurance from God tt he'll forgive me...

man.. school's tml.. it's both fun and not fun.. haiz.. also... pple may often say tt i'm like some really care free person always enjoying life and all.. haha.. not tt true la.. pamela like more carefree ar! haha... i juz seldom show my unhappyness ha... i'll juz play to make the day seem fun. and when it comes to blogging at night, iseal my probs inside here.. so tt it'll never come out! haha... such a silly thought.. haha....

k la.. i guess it's about time to turn in.. so nite nite!

edited.at.11.04p.m.

crap i heard today..

haha.. actually nothing much la.. haha.. today din do much stuff except playing maple and going for the edge ha.. so let's start with the crap i heard haha...

ok first, was when i'm at the edge,

"WOW!

read it backwards!! WOW!!

read it up-side-down!!!

MOM!!!"

-Jeremy Seaward

haha.. cool huh! den there was another about choice one which is funny if like u hear him say it out haha... it goes somethign like this,

"is this choice i chose, the right choice!?"

still got but lazy to think now haha.. so there's one last thing about KFC haha.. after eating BK, we came out and stood outside KFC at westmall. den matt told me to look at the ice-cream haha.. and said,

"what does the ice cream look like?"

den we said....

"It looks like shit!"

haha dun u think so?? haha.. so i was juz joking.. i said, "No wonder KFC no business! their ice-cream looks like shit!! ahahahaha!!" actually, i think they packing up or something la so not selling already... haha.. or maybe cos they really have no business!! LOL!!

I'm feeling..

-Sick and tired today... i slept 4 hours since i came home den i went for net thingy and do mission booth thing but i was still very sleepy... i'm happy i took the break and go home but....

-Guilty... i dunnoe.. i feel very bad about not going training.. i am really very tired and i am suffering from the dehydration thingy again.. i juz have many ulcers, sore throat and headache... u noe, the going to have fever feeling.. i have gotten fever twice after training le.. and this time is chinese new year ar.. so dun wan to fall sick...

-Better. after the long rest, my headach more or less subsided. was feeling much much better except for the ulcers.. hurts a lot ar..

-Lonely... haha.. cos i go home really early ar... den cannot go out with the rest for dinner... haha.. but i had net too la.. so it would be too much of a rush..

-Sleepy now. so i'll go get some rest cos tml's gonna be a busy day and i got lots of homework to rush.. somemore i juz reach home from the mission booth thingy so body very tired liaoz... nitez!

-Happy... cos carrie chong's on now!

I love...

Carrie Chong!!! haha... man... nite after nite she never fails to help me forget my troubles with her really ~sweet~ voice.. aww... haha... i juz feel comfortable with her 'around'.. though she'll never get to know me... it'll be my greates dream to ever meet her man... she's sooo cool and sweet..

anyway, i tot today would be juz the perfect day tt i could come home and rest my aching body, but i guess not! i had SC, SL meeting with the FL. haha... total defence day ar.. den wait for kumari den go home. on the LRT, a 10 min ride dragged on to a 45 min ride!!! damn train! hope it loses business! i got 920 so no worries ha! i was like sooo tired, and yet i had to stand one school period! kaoz!! i bet kumari would have reached home by the time i reached home... haiz...

okok.. so i cant play maple now and tt's juz sooo sick... really wish i could play some games.. anyway, got loads of things to settle.. argh!! E-club stuff too.. the money and all... got to do something about it la.. dunnoe why so much money gone... sianz.. i'm in deep shit.. gotta think of a solution now..

one last thing! haha.. though i din make it to president, i am still gonna do my best to fill up all ur toilets with toilet rolls!!! hahahaha!! i dun want to make all those who voted for me disappointed.. so i'll do my best! as for orientation... i am not in the commitee.. so not burning socks.. haha... kk... so tt's all for today. see u pple tml.. (gonna be another long day for me... zzzz..)

i juz reached home..

and i'm sooo tired!! haha.. today had some learning course thingy and she told us about the wood cutter story haha... i was like yeah!! my blog!! haha.. dunnoe if u guys remember that i wrote a story about the wood cutter?? haha... so cool.

anyway, last nite once again half asleep, i heard carrie chong say something about moblog. ahah... i think it should be something cool la. have not checked it out. i think the site was something like http://www.moblog.com.sg. so maybe u guys can go check it out or something haha... tell me if it's cool k!

so training today was quite tiring la and my feet hurts!! have to buy new boots le. jonathan's boots are D.E.A.D.. haha... after training went to eat dinner with tholasi and joanne. ha.. we juz chat chat chat and eat of course. man.. they're 2 really cool pple u guys muz make friends with! haha.. of course not forgetting the rest of the S2 gang la! haha... they make MI life like JC life. SO HOT IT'LL BURN UR SOCKS! haha... that's something soo cool tt i adapted from corinne haha..

k so time to go get lots of rest.. bye pple... i'm going for an early nite i guess..

Thank you miss Chan!!!

ha!! now i can finally blog.. actually i was not planning to blog cos i had nothing to say. i was doing my stupid exercise of containing anger again. seriously i noe i was rude to tee wei on tt hand shake and i'm sorry. i was angry at that point of time and i din want to show cos i was getting ready to go back to my old self. cos i wanted to be violent so tt i wont be bullied. the only way, store anger and release. did tt during my pri and sec school days. but now, i dun care if u guys look down on me cos i cry easily or what. me crying is a gift from God to help release my anger. instead of being rude and violent and get hated, i juz cry.

but thanks to miss chan, i did not go back to my old self. man.. i was juz sooo angry juz now, all the way home. i din open my mouth, i din tear, i din want to blog, i juz stare into blank space and think of tml's training and focus on playing hard and rough! i was juz ready to hit soo hard, no body will even touch me on time. i was damn mad and angry. but because of miss chan, i manage to release tt anger.

i found miss chan's blog. realise that her nick she used was sooo familiar. went back to my older entries to look for her comments to see if it was really her. and it was her! as i read her comments, i became curious about what i blogged last time, so i read the entry as well... it's mostly about esther and lilo. and as i read them, this tear juz came out. and i totally snapped out of my damn stupid anger containing thingy. thanks miss chan.... i nearly ruined my own life...

man..i would juz show no respect to anyone tml if i continue containing my anger. i'd be back to the lone ranger days only some of u noe of. i am juz glad that tt tear came out. it totally relieved me of everything. i dunnoe what i was thinking man. pple love me for who i am. why did i want to change!? ha! but i was really disappointed with my friends. though i am the one to be blamed i guess... i juz realise tt it is really hard to tell ur probs to anyone too.. not only the issue on trust. there's no point. i have to face the fact tt if i'm no where part of them. dun try to be one. cos u'll end up more hurt. cos u are not part of them.

now i feel soooo much better blogging and all... i dun care what u guys think about me. i definitely dun want to write these things everyday. i want to stop after the new fresh start thingy. so i'll juz forget about all the shit u guys have done to me or put me through. i'm not blaming u pple too. cos i'm the lame shit and i dun need to betray my friends (or should i say sell them out) in order to make the pack. whoever this person is, u are not a person who treasures friendship. so friends of such pple, u should becareful too.

one day.... i'll be hokage!!

haha.. quite a dream for me ya? haha.. hokage.. haha.. wad i meant is tt i'm gonna work real hard in everything i do now... maybe even in maths... i've got to start trying.. cos i got a feeling i wont be changing school or course or something. i muz do my best.. hope i pass chinese!! or even get an AO pass for maths... pls... God help me!! i want my A level cert!!

it also means tt i'm gonna work hard as a rugger too... gonna do my best! be more daring and radical. i really hate myself for having so little confidence.. in school, among friends, my CCAs... damn! i wanna be better! i've got to work hard man.. i definitely want to be a better rugger. i want to play more games. do something for my team. i really am excited for the A div's gonna work very hard for this period of time to really grasp wad they are doing and learn as much as possible.

anyway, school's back to normal. thing's still ok. was reminded about my past juz now.. i am sad but it's a stepping stone i have to take to learn. i love all my friends.. whether they hate me or not. whether i'm betrayed or not. the most, i'd juz get angry for a while den i ok liao. den fren fren again. i dun like to bear grudges or get angry.. cos i'm scared of having one fren less. (ok btw, all these tt i juz mention have nothing to do with juz now, to those who knew wad happen. it's juz tt i feel like writing stuff down.)

i juz wanna say sorry to this person. i guess he noe who he is. juz wanna settle stuff.. shall call him. i am praying for a fresh new start! so guys, see everyone of u tml!