28/02/06

oh my!!! how sad!!! i did my napfa today. 3 As, 2 Bs and..... a D!!!! OMG!!!!

argh!!! there goes my gold... man....

anyway, i'm quite glad too.. it's the first time i manage to do 9 pull ups!!! *woot* am proud of myself!! hahaha.... sadly for 2.4, i finished in 11.44 slower than before, 11.20...

but the good thing is that, i can run all 8 rounds!!! FINALLY!!! hahahahaha...

ok, juz realised something funny. today's the last day of the month. and during chem pract, i was asking kiat for today's date and i realised tmr's the day we collect our results which is also the 1st of march. so i juz happily assumed today's the 30th of feb!!! hahahahahahahahaha!!! wrote it in my chem pract ws! hahaha...

(for those who don't know, feb has only 28 days and 29 every 5 yrs.) =D

ok, so after school i dropped by world of JJ, hoping to find some useful cards to buy and sell and also help my friends look for cards.

decided to sit down for a game of magic. (for those who don't know, i'm kinda back to playing magic temporarily to waste my breaks away so tt i wont spend so much money on food! anyway, it doesn't work, cos i spend my money now on cards!!!)

alright. i played this guy and as usual like in school, i thought i was invincible when playing locals cos i would whoop everyone's butt and win with extra life.

HOWEVER! i whooped this guy on the first round to just 5 life, and he cleared my table of all my creatures and smacked me from 32 life to 0!!!! OMG!!!!!

thought it was juz luck, played again. i smacked him down from 20 (the starting life) to just 3. and he whipped me from 24 to 0!!!

ARGH!!!!!!! man!!!!

nvm. i'm not a pro. but he played like a pro. he game was going super fast! they probably memorise every single card there is in the whole game. i was like picking everyone up and reading them. -.-

haha.. and then the spectators were like playing the game for me cos i was too slow! hahahaha... they were like going "in response to ur faith's fetters, i sacrifice my creature......"
"HEY! u can sac ur creature to in response to his response!!!"
Me- "huh???? oh ok"
Opponent -" !@#$%()(*&^%#@! what talking u!!!"
my "supporters"- "!$**&^%$#@ can la!! u !*%$#@!"
Me- "huh?? okokok relax"
Opponent- "oh ya hor... so my creature also die la?"

and so it goes on.

hahahahaha... i din noe what in the world they wre talking about! they were like PROS! even when i play in school, they are like me, SOOOOO SLOW! hahahahaha...

haha.. good experience la... am gonna kick butts the next time! =P

26/02/06

i am super hungry. have not eaten much the whole day except for one tube of oreos.

enjoyed the chalet, had a sleepless night though..

today's evening service was really good. in the sense that it made me realise how much of a believer i have been than a disciple. i lost the passion, i lost the fire.

to want to go out to timor or somewhere else one day, i have to begin here once again.

so God, set me free so that i may set others free...

i need You.

24/02/06

okok, today was quite a wonderful day. loved training. hahahaha!!! man it was really cool!

we had our "cross country" run at macritchie den did 10 up-slope sprints which was a killer and finally played touch rug.

super fun la!!! and i wont forget this super nice try me and zaki did!! woohoo!!! the power of support =P

ok, den dropped by world of JJ to check em out. see latest deals and cards and stuff... i missed friday night magic though.. wanted to see them play haha...

ok, feel like a small boy once again. time to go back tobeing one!!! hahahaha!!! it juz makes me feel soo happy go lucky unlike these few days when i had sooo many things running through my head, affecting my day..

sooo ya. am super tired now. nitey!

firstly, i dun see anything wrong in clarifying things i feel is right.

if to u it is saving my pride, to me, it is not. maybe tt's how u view, maybe tt's what u'll do to save ur face but not me.

now i noe why u think i am proud when it is something i have almost never see in me. i dun show off, i always have to be the first to go up and say sorry. wad ever made u think i want to save my face?

guys may have their ego. but since young, i dun have the privilege of having this ego and pride in me since i was constantly being condemned. that has showed me how i much i should not condemn another and much worst, destroy another person's pride.

i know myself i am not like all u other guys. i am different from you. tt's why i nvr understand why i was hated so much by the yr 3 ruggers last time juz because i was potraying my joy of scoring a try.

i din noe tt was being cocky. it did not appear to me tt way. it's more or less my first beautiful try with my team mate. for crying out loud, wont u be excited too!?

if i had pride in me, would i forgive my friends so easily especially when they sell me out juz to gain favour?

wad ever made u think it was pride tt i wanted to clarify myself? even if there may be signs of pride to save myself, it was more of convincing another person that i feel that it is correct because it has happened before and not to put anyone else at shame.

so do get it right. pple may find it irritating, though i dun noe if it's true or not. but i personally dun care what they think as long as i know what i'm doing. pple see things in different ways. some pple may not like it, but to me, i think it's for the better of the team at times.

i juz wanted to know. want to know more. dun bring it too far.

22/02/06

ah... today's modern dance was good! i thought tt it was much better than NUS's "dance blast" or something hahahaha.. =P

i think they did superb! all the hip hop moves and all.. i was like "woah!!" wad do u guys think? haha... only see all the hot girls right!~ heh!!!

ok, training today was kinda like a major killer! i'm soooooooo tired! DEAD! maybe cos i juz ran 2.4 yesterday.. ha...

my body's aching, my neck feels as if it's gonna break. "cuts on my lips and in my mouth, scratches on my legs, bruises on my shoulders, chest and arms.... TOTAL RUGBY!"

haha.. had fun though... we did sooooo much tackling today la...

k.. am super tired... dunnoe how to explain my mood these days... feel really like tt of an introvert. i dun feel like playing a fool, i dun feel like interacting, there's not much pple whom i wish to see... i dunnoe. i feel soooooooo.... I DUNNOE! some kind of sickness man.... muz find a recovery. hahaha... home juz feels sooo depressing and now, going to school is not juz for studying, but being near my friends like ah kiat who would play magic and talk to me. hahaha... of cos not forgetting the rest of the ruggers and tennis girls and ya... ha... type so much but so lazy to name. =P

kk... am off!

21/02/06

CLICK HERE!!!

help me do this survey!! hahaha...

ok, it's not exactly a survey, it's rather like, what characteristics u see in me! haha...

CHECK OUT WHAT OTHERS HAS TO SAY!

20/02/06

been 2 months since i've returned from Timor...

i miss Timor soooo much...

PRESIDENT XANANA!!! IF U SEE THIS GRANT ME CITIZENSHIP THERE!!!!

hahahahahaha... i feel sooo free in Timor... miss that place soooo much...

anyway, today i skipped chinese lesson and got caught! ha.. but anyways, went back to watch a video which was sooooooo touching!!! i was on the verge of crying.. i watched the cartoon version of the show before and it is super sad...

i dunnoe.. i'm not sad, but i feel like crying... relieve myself of everything i've stored up in me. a form of liberation and i need it sooo much... SET ME FREE!!!

anyways, i'm excited about SPA tmr. wanna score well ha!! wanna ace my SPA! HEH!! get a lvl 7 or something =DDD

sooo... i better start studying cos i'm feeling real sleepy now...

19/02/06

Global Personality Test Results

Stability (50%) medium which suggests you average somewhere in between being calm and resilient and being anxious and reactive. Orderliness (23%) low which suggests you are overly flexible, improvised, and fun seeking at the expense too often of reliability, work ethic, and long term accomplishment. Extraversion (53%) medium which suggests you average somewhere in between being assertive and social and being withdrawn and solitary.

Take Free Global Personality Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

haha... i decided to do my own personality test and i realised how much i've changed hahaha... this is juz a short test though, shall do the long and more analytical one next time.

alright! today, i got to drop by CW to share with the kids about my timor trip! haha.. was real fun and nice. haha... i miss timor lots... i miss the time there, everything that happened... the pple, the wierd things... hahaha... most of all, the new friends made.

i dunnoe... but i feel real disatant these days... church friends... school friends... haha... it doesn't really matter though... i wanted time alone, now i get too much of it.

arh... who cares ya.

anyway, i'm happy i got to complete my chem hw. haha.. like i cant believe i would even bothered to do it. finished it in church before coming home...

i feel like my day's sooo incomplete. i feel like how i used to and i dun wan to feel this way. but what choice do i have? a feeling is a feeling ya. hahaha...

i juz hope something happens sometime soon would lighten up my days... days seem soo gloomy... miss my friends... miss pple whom i used to spend a lot of time with.

k... off to finish my newspaper cuttings... cya..

18/02/06

i feel sooo distant...

so far away, from everything. been a long time since i felt this way... i juz realised something about myself, i am becoming more of an introvert then in the past, an extrovert.

hmmm... i was juz thinking about last yr and how i changed sooo much... haha... i'm becoming quieter, i love time spent alone, i'm not so funny anymore, i juz realise how much i love the time i had when i could "tour" singapore... miss those times...

anyway, i guess, too many things i have erm... i dunnoe how to put it, but how i wish... how i wish... (nobody's understanding what i type now. ha...)

i juz cant stand life now, i want to move on but i cant. held back by so many things i cant bear letting go. i want to but it upsets me soooo much.

i guess i should.

hmmm... looking through some of the guides and maps, singapore is sucha wonderful place! haha.. i cant wait till i've totally explored singapore and begin exploring other countries like malaysia or even indonesia. hahaha!! i wanna travel!

now i realise why i am studying about the tourism industry! heh!!! cant wait to start working.

wanna enter the navy. wonder if i can though..

ah... enough for today.. church's making me feel more and more lonely these days, everyone's gone, pple there erm... nvm... history. (ok, it's a pun here)

i din feel like going today, but i felt sooo far, i pushed myself out of bed and left the house. thank God i did. sermon today though it did not really hit me tt much but it reminded me of my passion, and what made me go on...

hmmm... ok la... muz stop.

16/02/06

haha... today's a great day!

skipped chinese again! heh! wanna get home early and rest ya... haha...

i had lots of sleep in the evening, dunnoe why but i juz cant keep my eyes open hahaha... now it's late at night and i'm still up to something hahaha... making some stuff ya! hahaha... =D

ok, i recieved another letter from my secret admirer, who's no more a secret haha... =P but ya, it's quite funny that the last time i "complained" about it being in chinese, this time it's in english!! hahahaha... there's even this part tt says, "sorry to write a bit of chinese here" hahhaa... okok that's cute. ha..

ok, guess i'm gonna reply to tt last letter la... ha... so tt pple wouldn't be too heart broken and think i'm dao. haha... yeps. so after i'm done with my stuff, off to write my letter! =P

k la.. still got one more to make before i'm done. heh!

15/02/06

ah... another day has juz ended... i'm sooo sleepy! haha...

i have not been getting rest since the valentine's celebration on sat.. ha..

have been coming home late everyday so far! ha!!

cant stand it... but yea, i enjoyed those time spent with my friends... neways, am too sleepy to continue...

looking forward to tmr, am having some regional youth thingy, ha! wonder what it is...

kk. see u pple around.

I muz start saving money... broke

14/02/06

HAPPY VALENTINE'S TO ALL!!!

hahaha.. today, was quite a tiring day for me, i slept lots in class to make up for time lost during the nights, spent making my valentine gifts ya... only made 2 in all, and both costs me a bomb of time! hahahaha... bomb of time hahahaha...

okok, evening today was really exciting! went to orchard and i like saw the whole world there!!! hahaha!! NO WAIT! before that.

"to my dearest samantha cheng, happy valentine's day"

Love,

charles, USA

hahahaha!!! MISS CHENG!!! U MADE ME LOOK SOOO STUPID TODAY!!! HAHAHAHA!!! ok, on behalf of jia lin, who is on behalf of charles to get samantha flowers, i had to carry that whole large bouquet of flowers in my arms and having pple staring at me!!!!

man! it was sooooo embarrassing! they muz be thinking "wah, that guy ar, love the girl a lot, later she nvr turn up. SIAO LIAO!" hahahaha... soooo dumb!! i can hear pple murmuring, staring, laughing and looking at me!! hahahaha...

nono best part, I WAS IN SCHOOL U!!! hahahahahaha... "rich kid"

okok, den i saw like ah wei and like the whole bunch of the "5 wonders" a.k.a "toilet girls" hahahaha.... den i met 2 from 1st 3 months, met heston, (hotel trainee manager sia!! at the age of 20!!) hahaha.... met angel, clara, at NYDC, shanaz's working there tonight too! haha.. stupid, nvr come over give us discount... haiz...

okok, neways, had a wonderful dinner, I WAS HIGH!!! hahahaha... super hyper man! hahaha... i feel like the old me when i'm with the yr2s especially the tennis girls, make me feel young again!! haha.. we chatted had lots of fun. and they had to bear with all my crap and ego! hahahahahaha....

okokokokokok, i am super tired, want to make more roses tonight but guess i'll pass cos my eyes are shutting on me.

HAHAHAHA!! OMG!!! HAHAHA>>> KAMSUTRA!!! HAHAHA!!!!

ok, tt was one of the wierdest gift anyone would give but tt's wad kira got from leney!! ahahahahaha!! *HINT, BIG HINT* AAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHA~~~

okok, getting hyper already! muz stop! i wanna sleep!!! hahaha...

nitez pple... love all of u. happy V-day!!

13/02/06

i am dying here.. trying sooo hard to complete my V-day gift for my classmate... am dying...

i think i'll juz make it for the class gift exchange... the rest of you, i'm really sorry... am really worn... i've made abt 10 roses, only 3 can be used... damn napkin.. IT'S TOO THIN!!!

i'm really kiiling myself man.. how can i be sooo naive.. haha... "i shall make her a present cos it's more sincere..." i should've juz bought them chocolates like all the other guys la!!!

hahaha.. i'm really dying... i fell asleep while doing the roses, juz took my bath to wake me up and still, my arms are shaky from my lack of sleep..

slept at 3am yesterday...

ar... back to completing y "bouquet" of roses, probably die before i complete it.. God dive me strength....

13/02/06

ah... 2.20 in the morning, and i'm still awake!! ahahahaha!! am doomed tmr... surely sleep in class.. haha..

anyway, i have been doing something ya... wanted to finish it so tt i wont have to rush it tmr! so ya, still left with GP newspaper cutting...

was juz in my parents room a while ago... wanted to go for a shower.. ah.... it was sooooo wonderful. aircon and best of all, it had the smell of the "OFF!" insect repellent. the fresh scent. haha... REMINDS ME OF TIMOR!!!

why is timor so far away when it felt like juz an island off singapore to me when i arrived... i miss TIMOR!!!

anyway, i juz had to stay in the room a lil longer and think of thoughts that still linger in my head.. nice ones... many many nice and sweet memories... i wish december didn't pass and january did not come..

3 places i miss the most:
1. east timor
2.penang
3.macritchie reservoir

ha... man.. as i type this, i am finally beginning to feel sleepy... how i wish "God, u take me back into your kingdom and spare me this torture on earth..." take me.....

i dun see wad meaning there is on earth. it's all dead and dying. my job left here is to glorify God and to draw all men into his kingdom... besides love, riches means nothing to me. these are the only reasons why i would wish to continue living.

guess i have to get to work.

12/02/06

alright! haha... am really happy today! haha.. I DUNNOE WHY!!!

i was juz happy to be in service this morning, am happy that i get to see everyone in church. am happy that i'm juz happy. HA! WAD AM I TALKING ABOUT!?!? haha...

ok, kinda spent most of my day at home after tt... maybe i should've gone down for evening.. ha...

anyways, stayed home, played games, complete my maths and gp. ya... nothing much.. watched tv... ha...

ok, anyway, cut the crap. ha... this song. dedicated to you! =D

i dun really know how things are now, but u definitely have a friend here! =)

ha... juz listen and laugh! haha... friends ya... so many things happened. ha... appreciate u alot. ya... but do let me still be a friend ya ok? =)

ha... dunnoe why i'm writing all these, maybe i'm still high from last night lols! no la, juz wanna say, erm... i dunnoe la, haha... take care all of u!

12/02/04

hard rock cafe!!!!

ah... thanks, to all those who were concerned. ha... i'm fine. a lil down, no probs haha.. thanks jo, kum... u know who u all are hahaha... (brain's dead to think)

thanks liana!! you made my night. hahaha.. thanks for it, though i know i should not have done it. but a dare's a dare! i survived! hahaha...

den go home!!! i realised something, i was certainly brave! i actually nearly did something else which i dun wanna say here. haha.. come to me and ask me and i'll tell u! hahaha... i nearly did something on the train (clue) hahaha...

ok, am super tired. cant think now.
nite!

lalala~ RANDOM!

juz thinking about the phrase "forbidden love" haha...

fell asleep while thinking about it as i played this song "living to love you" ha.. love the chorus. i suddenly found it in my recieved files while looking at the photos hugh sent me on msn...

hmmm... haha... "he loves, but she forbids..."

thoughts abt this phrase juz flowed through. hahaha...

".... how the petals of a rose turns black as it falls off the rose..."

have u ever felt this way?

why is it my heart hurts at times when i think of you?

though we're so far apart...

why do i think i am hated?

though i know i've been once cared about so much...

why is it that you wont juz look at me and tell me how u feel?

though at times i juz wouldn't understand how you feel...

why do u just walk away so easily?

though it's the last time i'd probably see you...

why did i fall for you?

though i know i'd juz may never be with you...

why do i live days thinking i've lost a friend?

though you're juz there standing by the corner...

why do i feel as if i have lost a closest friend?

though we barely knew each other.

why do i feel this way?

i'd never know...

hahaha... I'M FINE k!!! haha... i'm juz thinking abt questions i used to ask myself. how silly and naive i might have been. most of the questions i prolly cant answer and cant understand what they mean when a girl reacts in a certain way. hahaha... i've never knew how to go after a girl. ha... most of you know it! i'm juz LOUSY! hahaha...

and FINALLY! sam admitted, i'm juz friendly and approachable. NOT A FLIRT!!! hahaha... totally suck at it, make myself look like a fool if i tried. prolly sometimes (when i think about the past) my silly innocence makes it look like i'm flirting hahaha.. but have stopped it already. like i've mentioned.. i'm not so fun loving anymore like i used to be... wanna be like last time, but i guess i've juz grown up. matured. HA!

i'm juz a lil more quieter than usual, dun socialize that much. ha... even yr ones this year barely know who gabriel is HA!!!! EGO! no fan club... heh!! hahaha... =PPPP

ah... now i'm so energetic. lols... from that sleepy mood to this "i cant sleep" feeling... tmr i've still got school... ha...

10/02/06

hahaha... today was nice man!

wah.. am super tired~!! had training juz now which was quite fun la! hahahaha...

i remember after all the runs and sprints, we had upper body conditioning. we had to like do 50 push ups and sit ups. man.. it was sooo cool when u see ur team mates juz helping each other to push on.

fighting and struggling, we made it through TOGETHER! and as nash got up, i was soo touched, i was abt to tear man... i was thinking, if i have this feeling and "tearing" during a game, HA! the opponent's gonna D.I.E!!!

yea, den we did a new cheer! and den i realised someone else felt the same way as i did! hahahaha... MANNAN!! lols! hahahaha.... i did not tear though. could hold it back. but i was super touched!

yea... am super tired... all i can say... hahaha...

TAXI UNCLE!!! AHAHAHAHA!!!! AH WEIs, AH kira!! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

08/02/06

haha!!! today kinda started off a lil silly!! hahaha...

i was giving comands for morning assembly and after the national anthem, i was gonna give the command for the pledge, den..... OOPS! i stuttered!! hahahaha...

thank God i wasn't intimidated by all the giggles and smiles that kinda made me feel like erm... OOPS! hahaha...

den today, i started playing cards again! hahaha.. a distraction! kinda played it during HT period and mr luke chen was being really nice hahaha...

he walked by, had a look, and after the class laughed at us, he walked back and continue. ha! we were like "huh!?!? what? huh? what thing so funny???" hahahaha...

hmmm... training was kinda slack today. i felt tt everyone was kinda off form, including me. haha... dunnoe.. like when we play touch, i felt as if i din have the "power" haha...

ok la, muz thank enos for treating us to dinner after training! hahaha.. thx!!! God's really blessing me. hahaha... when i had no money, ah wei, and kira treat. even when i was slightly richer, i had enos treating me. sooooo nooooow......

my turn ar? HEH!!! =PPP

haha.... shall see ya! i was taught that giving is much better than recieving! ha! and so, i pray a prayer of blessing for all 3 of u who have blessed me! TY!

kinda cant wait for the weekends.. man.. this year started off slow, but it's now flying fast! ha...

k la, am sleepy.. shall end here. =)

07/02/06

guess who's back! back again!! hahahaha..

guess i'm back to normal!! hahahaha... enjoyed my day a lot!!! hahahaha... had lots of fun! i'm finally like laughing and playing haha...

throughout this period of time, i kinda have distant myself a lil from the tennis girls but today, ha... kinda felt like buddies again!

AND EXCUSE ME!!! i'm NOT a FLIRT!!! hahaha...

thanks ar, sam. i was juz sitting around when sam suddenly said i was a flirt!! hahaha.. i violently objected of course! den she did a class survey asking "all those who think gabriel's a flirt..... BREATHE!" -.- ha! i lost my breath! hahaha...

ok, i can remember all the funny stuff man.. P.E and all, juz lazy to type. haha...

OH!OH!!! this IS GOOD!

the yr one's were starting this new trend of who can shoot their shoe the furthest in a kick. haha.. i was watching and den more and more pple juz joined them. -.-

den suddenly sadiq turned and said, "eh gab, next time they kick their shoes, we pick and throw it to the dustbin k!" den kira, diq and i were like "ON!" hahahaha.

so we waited and they did it again!!

"CHIONG AR!!!!" I shouted and we all ran out and picked their shoes!! hahahaha...

we grabbed them one by one and dumped them in the bin!! hahahaha!!!! too bad la! not enough of us ruggers to get em all! =P no ah wei and tee wei!! hahahaha...

den i suddenly heard a super loud cheer, i looked up, WOAH! everyone's outside their class looking at us and cheering for us!! LOL!!!! hahahahaha... my class cheered the loudest! =P hahahahaha!!!

hahaha... man we gave everyone a good laugh!! hahaha!!!

hadi was like givin me the thumbs up! hahaha...

yea.. fun day man.. hahahaha!!

06/02/06

heh!! alright! i came home earlier cos i wasn't feeling too well... physically and emotionally. hahaha... i nearly wrote it as mentally! =P

guess i needed a short break. i really din have the mood to continue on with the day. actually i would stay in school i did not feel sick.

but neways, i had a great time alone at home. i finished up some GP stuff now i juz met lay kuen to get my notes... hahaha... thanks!

hmmm... sooooo what i want to blog about, i suddenly forgot all about it!!! OH MY WORD! hahaha...

oh... hmmm.. was kinda feeling a lil sad and depressed again. ha.. din wan to do anything. juz kept reading and reading. it helps me keep my mind off stuff. for the past few days i've been reading a lot! haha.. reader's digest and all.. ya..

it helped me today during my timed assignment!! haha.. i think i wrote an average essay. din really like the topic. think i'll get 28? hahaha...

yeps! i feel refreshed nonetheless and i can keep my mind off what's distracting me. during my last few minutes in class, i was chatting with kai kiat.. haha... he and girls... but he knows them well man!! haha... he was juz joking here and there, laughing about some of his experiences, about all the silly CHINA GIRLS! hahahahahahaha....

he really made me feel better, console me, assuring me, hahaha... a friend in times of need. haha.. what a bro. was kinda funny though... nvr thought he would be soooo "wise" hahahaha!! =PPPP

hahaha... ok! i've juz gotten back my chem stuff sooooo i need to chiong my assignment and i wanna study for my practical!! muz score!!! hahahaha... miss lee wrote "gd effort" now i feel so presurized, cos i copied it all from the NOTES!!! AHAHAHAHA!!!

okok, enjoy ur day!

05/02/06

couldn't sleep last night after i reached home... i had soooo many things in mind. i juz couldn't keep it off...

i played wc3 to keep my mind of it, but that only lasted till my mom cut me of the internet...

den back to lying in bed and not being able to sleep. den i turned to God and asked him to put me to bed.

---------------------

woke up this morning, sad, disappointed and juz troubled with my problem... thought sleep would have helped me get rid of it, but guess not.

so went to church, sat down, service began, tried to worship. my heart wasn't there. it was with where my problem laid....

den an altar call was made for those who needed ministry who needed something. i knew i needed God.

i went there, still trying, talking to God... my heart was torn, i juz din noe wad to do...

den someone came, and prayed for me, laughing and joyful, he said to me. "the joy of the Lord is your strenght!", "the Lord is with u in ur problem, in ur time of need."

it was like he knew what i was going through. cos i kinda hesitated going out for the altar call cos it wasn't kinda suited for my need, or i thought so. but bro andrew did say, those who has NEEDS. i did.

den the love of God began to fill me, i felt warmth.. my face, my hands, my body... it was sooo erm loving. den he walked away, i stood there crying.

den another came to me, he told me exactly the same thing the first guy who prayed for me did. den he moved away.

finally, bro oen came. and i felt soooo much love from him... he stroked me on my back as if knowing how i felt. my heart juz broke, and i cried and cried. he told me, "do not dispair, the joy of the Lord will be ur strength. what ever u are going through, the Lord says, He's with you."

i thank the Lord.. and my heart ached soooo badly. i walked back to my seat, still crying, thanking the Lord. at the same time my heart still ached.

sermon began, and soon, the pain disappeared. and i remember bro andrew saying "when the Lord repeats it, He's speaking to you!" he was preaching about being loyal to God.

i think i know who prayed for me, i did not open my eyes, but i think it was bro john wong, den another john,(the one who's always having prophecies) den bro oen..

neways, i left church feeling good! hahahaha...

reached home, sleep, and woke up feeling all GOOD! haha... the joy of the Lord is my strength!! hahahaha...

alright! i feel like i'll begin the next week all different! i dunnoe. i juz dun feel sad and all... i dun worry or think. hahahha...

-you woke me up

when u broke my heart.... =)

05/02/06

i dunnoe why, but only now den i remember all these things...

i wanted to thank u guys so many times but i keep forgetting... though i'm not really in the mood cos i guess i'm kinda tired... in many ways, if u get what u mean... bet u dun though..

but i really wanna thank ah wei for his treat, and of course akira too. cos it's really once in a lifetime. and he wouldn't let me settle for students' meal. ha... thx man...

den of course today, moses, who spent the night with me after i got pan sehed by samantha and her bf. ha... not u, miss cheng hahaha...

thx mo, thx for the cookie, for the time spent waiting with me... most appreciated...

den i'm sorry if i hit into ur personal space... am really sorry... (not u mo) i noe, it's the biggest mistake to say sorry, cos it makes me look so weak. but so be it. juz wanted to be there... make u smile...

den of course saha, for being understanding, for being supportive...

i guess, i've hit the end line. shall not continue, cos i know words of depression are always stupid. trust me. =) no matter how close a friend may be, dun share them. =)

am juz thinking about how sooo not fun-loving i have become... maybe i've grown up when i thought i would never? i would choose not too. and be like wad sam said, "ke ai, tian zhen de gabriel" hahahaha... (cute and innocent) lols. sounds so stupid, but i'd rather remain a kid and have friends whom would play with me, keep me company.

enough! i said not to say anymore hahahaha!!!! night!
forgive the cheesiness of this entry!!! hahahaha... i juz snapped out! hahahaha!!!

03/02/06

ah... am running a fever now... i knew it would come la..

have been pushing myself quite a bit and getting not enough sleep. actually, quite a lot of sleep la.. haha...

but ya.. i din wan to come to school today, and it's like i told my mom on thursday... she din let me.

reached school, headache, proly cos of my lenses, slept quite a lot in class...

den after school, training... training was ok la... not tt tough. din feel tired or sick, but after when i was on the lrt, man.... i couldn't stand it. i had to sit, there were no where to sit.

den reached back, i din realise it but i juz fell asleep...

as for my lenses, one side was wrong. i knew it! but i got it checked and done. sooooo ya... tired man...

fever.. argh.. tmr still have school...

-----------------------------------------
man... miss u my friend...

01/02/06

alrighty!
gabe has bought himself a new pair of shoes!!! yay!!! finally. i dun have to wear a pair of shoes with 2 sides being different. hahaha... cos each of my pair of shoes has one side being worn of, so i mixed and matched. one orange, the other grey. hahah..

neways, i felt i have enjoyed my day though i feel quite dead today in school. am real tired la... nothing else much. how could i be sad, when i started off the morning nicely! ;)

if i knew how, i would do the same every morning ya! =D

ok, soooo... i totally forgot what i wanted to blog about, but i have not been doing my hw!!! gonna go for hw period soon man...

i am soooo tired now, i dunnoe whether i should do my work and sleep in class, or go to sleep and die the next day. or to juz die another day by skipping school! =P

doubt i'd skip unless i fall sick, which is quite a probability given my sore throat and lack of fluids for the past few days... have been trying to rehydrate myself here and there, and have been going to the toilet more often lately...

hmmm... i need rest... shall see what i can do. shall finish up gp i guess... i'm juz soooo tired...

hafta start now!

01/02/06

i was searching for a bad dream..
but while searching for it, i found something more than a bad dream.

"beautiful things are often filled with pins..."

i juz realised something... beautiful things aren't filled with pins.. it's us who fills it with pins...

so i'll make sure now, for every beautiful thing, i shall not fill it up with pins. i'll fill it with joy laughter and every sweet thing... =D

alrighty! feb 2006!

thought i'd blog juz before i go to school. i was abruptly awaken. dunnoe how i woke up so early. i thought i was late cos i din hear the alarm. den i realised, i woke up 10mins before the alarm hahaha...

okok, it's like a new year. hahaha.. today's gonna be a short day, but i've got training!! =D OH!! if it's too sunny, think i shant train... i got SUN BURN!!! hahahaha...

okok off to school with my new tan! shall enjoy it while it lasts!! hahaha...