A little story

there's something tt i juz wanna share... juz a little story... yea... it's about a female, a women, a mother. dun everybody agree with me tt almost every mother really love their children no matter wad? y?? it juz makes me think, why do mothers love us so much?? sometimes even more than our fathers. is it because they've got to spend 9 months more with us than anyone else? it's special, something unique tt God made each and almost every mother this way.

many a times we've watched movies where a child is gonna perform or go for a competition, and they really wished tt their parents could be there to see them.. but some how or rather, their parents cant make it maybe cos they're working, or maybe they're overseas... how about both?

it's sad... for both mother and child... especially when the father is gone... i'm not too sure wad happened but my maid, she's been working for us for probably 4 yrs... for these 4 yrs, she's seen me and my sis grow up but not her own children... she's got to bring home money for her family. through this period of time, i guess her husband left her.. men... we're so useless.. right now, ivan lim's words are running through my head.

tt day when i was late, i had a really long chat with ivan lim... cut things short, he ended with this for me to ponder on...

"Do you know why women are more successful than men?

it's because they are responsible. ... ... ..."

yea... it's a suprise but my maid's daughter is somehow a champion in karate in the regions of java, batam, jarkarta and a few others. she's travelling round the country and participiating in competitions. but every single time, she's the only one up there to recieve her medal... the runner ups would have their parents celebrating with them while the champion, she just falls back to a corner and then disappear into the hallway with her coach, friends and sponsors...

as she told me how disappointed she was, she was looking out the balcony. the light which came in from outside lit her watery eyes... and it kinda made me feel sad for her, but i dunnoe wad to do or wad to say.. she placed the food on the table and went back to her room where she's constantly typing overseas sms to cheer her daughter on... i believe every single sms went to her daughter with a tear drop... how much she loves her daughter and really wants to be there but because of the poverty she and her family faces, she cant be with her family.... the only way to show love now, is to provide the family with money...

i know tt her daughter's working hard to make her mother proud. training hard everyday thinking of her mom, and every time she compete's her mother becomes her base of confidence.

there's just this little part in every female tt makes them special to me. like i've said before, no matter how strong, how hard hearted any female will be, there's always this small little part of them tt makes em really "fragile" to me tt is. they're special, unique, and they love being loved, be it family members or boyfriends. men, have let them down many a times, and sometimes, they let us men down but beacause of this special thing in them, i realise, many females are repentful and sincere about it. they are loving creatures tt God created. they suffer the most, but they make every human life complete.

so to u guys out there, treasure ur girls ya... but most of all, love ur Mothers. they are the ones tt has gone through the most pain of giving birth to u while all ur dad could do was to push her on, care for u while our dad's are working, worry for our futures when all our dad could say "just do your best." they may put in extra effort to nag at us but they love us all more than anything on this earth...

thank God for women, thank God for mothers....

friday...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LAYS!!!! (ur favourite colour ya? haha..)

make it up to u here cos i might have spoilt it today... but anyways, thx for always being a friend. =)

did not have too much of an enjoyable day today.. tired, and all.. some other stuff too... my parents din go down for parents evening today so i can go home!! haha.. mdm mecanas help me.. haha.. she let me off from duty... yay!! but in the end i also had to help carry water till my whole shirt all wet la... -_-" i juz bathed some more..

hmmm.. heard a funny joke from ah wei while in the toilet haha.. made me laugh til i could not wear my pants. i wore only one side den i was hopping all about cos i kept laughing and i was preventing my pants from touching the ground... was wet la.. everyone bathe den the water splash out..

chem and physics are getting harder and i am getting sleepy so bb!

tired, tired, TIRED!!

arh.. i'm soooo tired today.. i dunnoe why also... i juz cant wake up in the morning, i slept through chinese... ar...

haha.. i am soo happy to have sucha nice chinese teacher la.. haha... after i changed my chair to the other roller, computer type chair, i was adjusting the seat to fit my head haha.. cos i wanna sleep!! i was right in front of cher but she like juz continue teaching, waking me occasionally haha.. best part, i slept with my face facing her hahaha.. she also not angry... i guess her mood today's good ha...

the aircon was soooo nice tt after lesson, i stayed in S1 and continue sleeping for a while more..haha.. at least they did not mind me sleeping in their class.. hmmm.. wonder who's sit was i at..

anyways, the day went slow and the last period, phyisics, i ended up sleeping majority of the test review.. haha.. too tired.. cannot tahan... Mr chen only woke me up after i stopped putting my head on the table and sleeping with my face up haha.. wierd huh?? i tot head on table will kena caught so i put my head up hahahaha... but anyway, after he called me up, i wasn't too sleepy...

now i'm real tired too... guess, i'll do a bit of work and go to sleep already.. bb!

a lot to blog about!

haha.. actually i have lots to blog about man... but i'm lazy and tired haha.. so i'll juz hit the main parts of my day.

"dead poet's society"
man.. this is a really nice show la!! lit students would definitely love this!! the show's a really nice and touching show... aww... sad man... but really really nice.. a muz catch! aww... but there's one really, really sweet part hahaha... wishi have the guts la.. hahahaha... i'm so gutless when it comes to tt. haha..

den the day went by fast and nice, finally, time for training!! woot!!! i was super hyper today! not juz training but all day long!! haha.. singing songs, popping by classes to say hi to frens, ex-classmates hahaha... even during training, i was having sooo much fun, i cant feel tired!! i mean a bit la, but it doesn't disturb me like usual haha...

i liked the circuits, especially when we did it as a group. haha.. i love giving the timing!! haha... was soo cool, cos we're always the first to finish haha... din really cheat la. i think we did not even cheat. ya... was fun man!!

we also did a 20 x 100 sprints for our physical con!!! ooh!!! sooo power la!! i was really pushing like crazy, thinking af all kinds of method to shorten the distance, haha.. our baton, a ball. so we kicked, throw, did wad ever we can to cut short!! haha... sooo fun!! was quite tired after all the sprinting but because i was still playing a fool, i recovered real fast from the tiredness haha..

finally, night study. finished physics tutorial and come home. haha.. the night's nice... gave me this very special feeling... especially tonight... aww.. haha... i juz feel good la!! hahaha...

so now i'm gonna do some other stuff and go to bed... muz chiong my maple character!! 80% to level liaoz!! for 2 weeks i had no progress haha.. finally!!!

God's Special..

haha... i juz wanna say tt today was quite a fine day.. nothing went wrong or anything, got my physics file done up quite fast... problem's still chem and tt's the reason why i dun like miss lee's lesson now cos i dunnoe when she's juz gonna ask for the file.. ha....

anyway, God has been really good to me this week. first is tt, i manage to get through yesterday fine... today's quite enjoyable and i dun have homework or anything today hahaha... cool huh!

during night study, i manage to speak to one of my catholic fren about Jesus. the reason i mention catholic is cos, catholic may noe Jesus, but they juz dun see his reality.. maybe not all catholics are like tt but most are. wanna noe the reason, ask me hahaha.. den i can tell u about Jesus vs priest.

finally get to touch maple a lil today.. but i'm real tired already... suppose to go for prayer but i only finished school at 7. had meeting and all... am glad i din go down too or else i'll mis out my chance to tell my fren about Jesus.. =D

kk.,.. gonna go hunt for chem and physics worksheets to add it to my file.. ha.. nitez pple!

a new week begins!

haha.. a new week begins and it feels weird cos tak ada rindu macam mana ke hadapan!! hahaha.. ( might not make sense cos it's probably broken malay hahaha..) but anyways, today was fun la!! hahaha

another day filled with me bouncing about playing a fool and getting stressed over my work!! hahahaha... ya la!! work! spoil my almost perfect day!! but anyway, during GP, i got to watch this movie, "dead poet society". it's quite a nice show. would like to borrow the cd and watch again cos i din quite get the starting... the volume of the projector was a little low...

next fun part was P.E!!! hahahaha.. it's like once in a blue moon where ah wei would kena bastard!! hahahahahahaha!!! today's the day the moon's blue! hahahaha.... -_-" lame i know! but it makes me laugh! hahaha... so i shall not bastard him but.... i shall! hahahahaha... it's got to do with a dumbell + 50kg weights and ah wei! hahahahaha... "can la, can la....", "cannot cannot!!" hahahahahaha!!! we should not help him with the bar hahahaha... den he'll be stuck on the bench ahahahahaha!!! bench press becomes b*ea*t (a bit obscene la, with the * looks a bit nicer.) press for ah wei!! hahahahahaha!!! so funny!!

okok.. dun go disturb him ok! laugh all u want now and forget it tml! hahaha... best part of the day was fun touch marathon which i had with ah wei, nesh, johnny and vick and shazrul! woot!! fun!! first time, non-stop 30-45 mins, no break fun touch!---> a high sprinting touch rugby game. wah!! fun la!! i defended like mad, attacked like mad and wet my t-shirt like mad! i was soaked in my own perspiration!! was dying of thirst but i pushed on! i juz cant stop!!! hahahaha....

haha.. anyway, i am soo happy now cos i was juz doing some stress relieving playing with love calculator hahahaha... soo funny.. made me laugh till i nearly drop! hahaha... took away all my troubling thoughts. juz typed and test, typed and test! hahaha.. man... amazing thing! hahaha... long time since i touched it hahaha... last time i touched it was when fab was playing a fool with it la! hahahaha... was typing everyone's name i can think of!! hahaha... mine, my friend's hahaha... so funny! not all me and someone la, but like my friend and someone else etc. hahaha.. cannot say who or tml they'll be pestering me and asking me hahaha...

anyway, time to go to bed. tired... tml another long day ar... soooo nights pple!!

oh ya, the story about the sex education thingy... aww... it's soo touching....

moodless...

am real tired today... couldn't wake up this morning... got class ar... missions and evans.. but anyways, aint gonna be too depressing a blog entry since i'm feeling better... juz needed to blog before i start on my work...

so... it's not true that all ur problems are gone after the exams.... i have lots of work to catch up on now... suppose to finish ALL of it on friday but it was impossible... no choice i brought miss lee's notes and everything home to copy... which i noe i'd most probably get a scolding, but i deserve it la... always not doing my work.... but i know tt i'll finish it somehow through God's grace... somehow, sometime soon...

once again, i have lots of things to think about... nothing much nothing important juz some things tt needs giving some thought to... haha... tak rindu macam mana though, if u guys were wondering ha...

really wanted to go for dinner with the rest after service... really wanted to hang out with em a while more... as usual, i did not want to go home... i mean like, it's juz me not to go home early and do my work, like i even care about my work right. but i guess, i have to set my priorities right... it's about time i "wake up my idea" ( like how miss lee would say it.. ) and start putting what's more important first. i mean it's like 1 more week before i get too see em and hang out and all... dunnoe la... haiyo....

on my way home, i juz kinda have juz enough time to think about everything, juz "talking" to myself in my head.. ha... yea.. haha... at times, like in my lesson on relationship today, i do feel empty.. i feel like something's missing. i totally understand what it meant and how it feels... i know there are many of u out there too who feels lonely, u juz need something to fill it. so probably a girlfriend? ya, i guess tt's when we often do ya? but Jesus is here to fill up that emptiness, He loves us when or if nobody does... ya.... me, i do feel tt feeling once in a while these days.. ha... it's true i do miss loving someone... been a long time since me and ec went our seperate ways, i do feel tt emptiness too.. sometimes, i juz totally forgot about God haha... my imperfectness and i turn to my friends... but when i turn to Jesus, i do see and feel a change in my life and i'm constantly reminding myself to turn to Him whenever i'm lonely... or feeling empty...

maybe yesterday i a bit miserable cos aku really tak nak rindu macam mana pergi... hahahaha... but ya.. once the rest of the SCs arrived, i had lots of fun ya... i din feel sad, left out or anything, in fact i was juz talking and telling them about Jesus... was real cool.. haha.. helpin me practice my future speeches tt i'm gonna make!!! hahaha...

it's pain being alone, but the feeling of being alone juz comforts me... haha.. i'm wierd ya... i guess, it does make me sad but i feel comforted some how.. like nothing's there with me to bother me.. ha.. my selfish thoughts of being alone again.. haha... guess only some of u noe about tt thought... the thought of how i'd live alone in this world haha.. and when i thought it was too lonely, i added a partner into my "dream" hahaha...

anyways, as i reached the LRT, i met the solomon island team again, and so, i did not feel lonely or wad. by the time i reach home, i juz felt great i guess it's cos i was interacting with God again.. was praying for them in the LRT... sooo.. ya... i guess how i feel today is more or less covered in this entry...

hmmm...

ok... dunnoe what title to put but first of all,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JO A.K.A LPP (LAO POPO), JOSEPH, JOE, JOJO, haha.. making fun of ur name lol!

so i had bbq juz now, SC one.. was quite fun la!! haha... enjoyed myself a lot! we juz sat around, chatted, played games.. haha... missing one rugger though! hahahaha.. u noe who.. and zhi wei left sooo early la... haiz....

i ate dory (not so sure how it's spelt haha...) sooo yummy!!!

wanted to tah pao and bring for the rest of me church frens but guess they were gonna go off early so i went back to the pit and had MORE fun haha...

hmmm... wad else ar... hahahahahahahaha!!! i know!!! hahaha... i am suppose to have this entry in another language haha.. but i needed help from tho to translate properly or my sentences wont make much sense hahaha..

it's suppose to be for fun la. hahaha... was talking about rindu machiam mana hahaha.... secret... lol! clue, direct translation. hahaha.. haiz... i feel haha.. i also dunnoe... i dun feel sad or wad la.. i haha.. but den shstill feel ok leh... maybe is really the look on my face la haha... shahani said i looked sad at the bus interchange and at the bbq area, tho or someone said i looked sad AND miserable hahaha... aww... haha... rindu machiam mana!!!

the others played truth or dare and one was to kiss me on my forehead!?!?! oh my word! <---i sound like brian hahahahaha.. JJ had to kiss me on my forehead or another girl!! haha... no wonder he come sooo close la! wah.. ticklish sia... hahaha.. so dumb...

anyways, i've got lots of work to do... and i dunnoe how to finish em all.. haiz... ar.... sianz.... tml muz do all le... no plying, hanging out blah blah.... zzzzz...

ok an update for yesterday!

ok... i remember le!! haha.. after all my trainings and the AGM, (annual general meeting) i had to do chem!! ar!! haha... suppose to help out to paint the den but i had too much work so i went to have a shower, best part, no towel! hahahaha... soo nvm, i still manage to get myself dry with my uniform haha.. was wearing a sleavless so it was soooo cold when i came out!

den got dried up more and did my work in the canteen... there's suppose to be night study but i did not see a single soul in sight in the canteen... man.. i'm like "haiz... gonna be alone tonight..." no teacher, no students to pei me.... aww... ~lonely, i am so lonely...~ hahaha.. i turned on the lights and fans for the back row and started on my work...

though i worked continuosly, i realised that i was working quite slowly... (cos i wanted my tutorials to look nice nice... for once! haha..) i only manage to clear 3 tutorials from 7.50pm to 9pm... haiz... i still have one whole load... excluding tests, revisions and all... argh!!! soo much!! alone!! no miss how!!! hahahahaha... there i go again...

haha.. at least if there was a teacher, i wont be so bored cos can chat la... so i turned on my radio on loudspeaker and juz did my work haha.. den nearing 9pm, students start coming down... FROM THE CONFERENCE ROOM! (o.O) sooo tt's where thay all went! hahahaha....

at least when nurus went to the toilet i did not feel soo lonely cos she's juz friendly ya! she's nice, cool sweet and all ya haha... came out of the toilet singing the song my hp was playing haha...

sooo ya... later i got bbq and it's raining sumos and buffalos!! how to go out!! bbq some more.. how ironic. soo ya.. waiting for the rain to erm... simmer? down... haha... dunnoe wad word to use... calm down? hahaha....

while waiting, i did some work and had some sleep... the rain's coming in and hitting my la.. soo nice... soo cooling... when i woke up, i realise my whole body's sooo weak from yesterday.. all the things i carried.. ar... my body was shivering, not because i was cold nor was it like a weak feeling.. i wasn't moving my body but it was juz shaking... felt nice.. so went back to sleep...

anyway, i've gotta go wash up and leave for school already for bbq sooo u pple around!

fun day..

ok today's a really fun except the fact that miss how's leaving... aw.. haha..

started the day off with me signing out!! wuahahaha!! had a dental appointment la haha.. i was actully able to juz go out and reach on time but the teachers were like questioning me non-stop la!!! especially when mdm zah came in.. ha... but i had fun there la.. the staff there were just boosting my ego telling me things haha.. some things.. heh!

soo.. best part, when i walked out, i saw miss how! hahaha... even better, she was smiling la! hahaha.. not at me though hahaha...

today's quite a cool day, as i took the bus out, i met jun yan, ex-newtowner and ex-millenian. haha.. den as i went up the platform, i saw my ex-colleague. bet she's quit the company and started doing a more decent job. ha... feathers.. bet they've closed down! buncha cheaters and liars.. hahaha.. my manager earns his 10 bucks juz to spend it on a can of baron's strong brew and once he's out of money, he's back on his feet, half drunk selling our product again.. hahaha...

den i met afiq haha.. he was like "wad u doing here? not going school ar?" den i ask him "u leh?" he replied "i go see doctor." den i'm like "i go see dentist" haha.. i juz find it cool when we had our conversation haha.. it juz happened real fast.

hmmm... enjoy the quiet trip down to HPB where i had my teeth checked... man... arh... nvm.. shall not say... but i wish i was rich!! hahahaha...

went back to school, pple were like suprised haha... so late come lol!

evening had lots of fun in some leadership training. hahahaha.. was abt to touch on miss how again but i shant la. hahaha... like sooo idiotic of me ya! hahahaha...

had a lot of work to do, sc, rugby (i juz lost the rest of my entry so i'm gonna cut short) oh ya, i think i talked about how forgetful i am today. suppose to call mdm mecanus but i forgot so i juz smsed her to check if she's asleep.. forgot to meet her after school... forgot to take my compo from mr fung cos i need to type it out... aw.. so troublesome.. haha. maybe if i got 29 marks, i need not type it out.. haha...

anyway, i juz lost my entry again, so like i was saying, my hands are all tired and shaky so i'm gonna go to bed.. haha...

HOW??? she's gone..

physics demo lab

lol!! today i went for some physics demo lab which i did not really want to go la.. but i went and i had lots of fun la!! haha.. i love playing with liquid nitrogen!! haha.. best part is tt it is really cheap la! 20 cents one litre hahaha.. use it as air con in the room!! haha..

i kept blowing into it den cold fumes of H2O will come out haha.. den i'll play with it... haha.. i'll either be sucking the fumes in and blowing it out or i'll be deep freezing leaves and crushing them like crackers!! wuahahahaha!!! soo fun la!! haha.. i even got vieo of it in my hp.. ahaha.. and mo sounded horny!! hahaha... "blow, blow, again kannan!" AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! lolololololol!!!

ya... horny.. haha.. sooo gonna finally go for my dental checkup tml... morning at 9am... one good thing no school (but i'll be coming back la..) next thing, dunnoe if can get to see miss how haha... she's leaving tml ya. soo ya... pple who want to remember her, BRING UR CAMERAS!!! lol... wont be bringing mine though haha...

aw.. soo sad ya.... she's leaving... soo fast.... i juz found out tt i missed one whole excursion with hr taking my class la!!! thanks to my rugby game!!!! arh!!! hahaha.. but still, i'd go for my game la.. sooo.. haiz.. wrong day man... tt excursion.. bleah...

okok... sooo i also dunnoe whether want to go tell her goodbye or not haha.... sooo guess, she'll juz be part of MI's best eye candy yas?? haha... not many pple can make it into the book ok! hahaha...

sooo... ya.. gonna go to bed soon! sooo hope things turn out fine tml, like when i come back from dental, i'd get to see her at least one more time before i go for chem lecture! hahaha...

2 more days...

today's wednesday... tt means tt there's 2 more days before my eye candy is gone.. aww man.... haha... quite sad la.. haha... juz found out on my way home tt i'm not the only one going gaga over her la haha... actually, not say until soo gaga la... juz erm.. haha... nvm...

aww... who wont la... she's an angel.. hahahaha.... really!

anyway, had a field trip to the sembawang naval base which was.... sooooo boring!! ar... sooo sleepy... den had to wear helmet and all haha.. so troublesome.. but one thing's for sure, they have good CURRY PUFFS!!! wuahahahaha!!! seconds anyone? i did! hahaha....

at the end of the Q and A, akira was dared to ask where they get their curry puffs. haha.. he said "my friend ask where u buy ur curry puffs ar??" den i was like hahaha.. time to sabo. actually no one asked where the curry puffs were gotten from but i decided to disturb kiat. so i was like "kai kiat!! wah... why u want to know!? haiyo... haha..." den he malu sia haha...fun la...

had fun today...

wah!! my bad habit haha..

haha... i did something really really embarrassing today la!!! hahaha.. like all of u noe, when i'm super hyped up i juz say things for the sake of either staying excited or cos i juz cant think on time to react calmly hahahahaha...

one of the most embarrassing thing tt happened is in school juz now!! hahaha... i was like juz chatting and joking with liana den i noe miss how's in the next class saw thulasi walked out already den i was like "hey! hey! u noe the teacher inside, she go out already!?!?!" haha.. miss how's inside la.. haha..

den liana was like "you mean tt teacher there ar??" wah!!! she's at the corridoor!!!!! wah!!!!! i dunnoe how to react la!!!!! i blur diao!!!! hahahahahahaha... oh no!!! now i'm soooo embarrassed!! hahahahahaha... so malu!!!! ah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HOW!?!?!?!?!?

LOL!! soo embarrassing la... ar..... haiz.. hahaha.

ya... i always end up saying all the things tt i should keep to myself whenever i am like super hyped up hahaha... man... somehow i wish tt i dun get soo hyped up everyday haha... but tt means the day would be quiet.. haiz... haha...

had fun with the tuggers juz now (it's no typo error) tuggers, tt's right. tt's what the touch girls name themselves lol! haha... was juz joking aroung juz during break.. was suoer silly but fun la. den the violent girl hahaha.. so scary!! gimme a lot of blue blacks. haha.. *pinch pinch pinch*

ha... i juz joking about ignoring u until u tame down haha.. so dun angry ya! if angry, juz go for akira!! wuahahahahahaha!!!! kk u all take care yas! cya pple!!

Full Marks!!

haha... i think i'm gonna get full mrks for listening compre!! hahaha.. it was quite easy la! and when teacher collected the papers, i think i saw someone with the exact same answers as me!! haha..

the paper's really really easy and understandable haha.. so ya, it has helped me cover up for my oral haha..

spend the whole day mapling and dotaing in comp lab until i become friends with lab technician ahahahahahaha!!! he's erm.. haha.. nice la.. i tell him close one eye, he really let us play haha.. if not, our passwords will be revoked haha...

went home with ah wei, kira and leney. haha... half an hour of pure sillyness!! HAHA... camo on the yellow line!?!?! hahaha... mungents! haha... bet all of u dun get it la! haha... except for some especially the ruggers. haha..

haha.... leney leney leney... hahaha... k la. i still ur fren la hahahahaha.... not like i'm racist against germans or something hahahaha... had a fun time with them la... pure lameness hahaha...

den on my way i met timothy and louis from the solomon islands. haha.. they're nice pple going back this september to take over the church in solomon island. man.. i wanna go there!! it's life by the sea!! woot~ best part, there's so many islands there, juz take a boat round and go fishing!!! wow!!! sooo nice.... aww.... hopefully like the standard of living there is low, maybe i dun need to work and i'll live on fishes!! hahahahaha...

kk... shall not make this entry too long.. so shall stop here and go to bed le... tml muz chiong level up!! =P

man.. this suck.. haha...

i'm in schoool now doing... NOTHING!! as u can see, i'm blogging cos i din noe that there's no school!!! no wonder kelvin's online until 7! argh!~ i could've maple until i level up this morning. haha...

i din want to go to school today.. was feeling a lil sick la... den i was like, "if i'm late for school, i'm gonna tell my dad to turn back." i thought i was gonna be late cos my sis and dad woke up late today and i woke up at 5am.. haha.. so by the time we left, on my dad's car clock, it was 7.17am!!

i knew i was gonna be late. prayed a short prayer and went to sleep. when i we were near my school, going up the slope, i heard over the radio tt it was 7.37am. i was like. woah!~ guess i'm not going to be late! haha..

reached juz on time only to find tt there were only 7 SCs present. all from commerce. i din noe anything but they were staring at me. i was like WTH!? then i realise, i had no school!!!! argh!!!! thank God akira's in school so not so lonely...

now gonna go maple and hope tt i dun get caught! wuahahaha...

`Lean On Me~

Sometimes in our lives we all have pain
We all have sorrow
But if we are wise
We know that there's always tomorrow

Lean on me, when you're not strong
And I'll be your friend
I'll help you carry on
For it won't be long
'Til I'm gonna need
Somebody to lean on

Please swallow your pride
If I have things you need to borrow
For no one can fill those of your needs
That you don't let show

Lean on me, when you're not strong
And I'll be your friend
I'll help you carry on
For it won't be long
'Til I'm gonna need
Somebody to lean on

If there is a load you have to bear
That you can't carry
I'm right up the road
I'll share your load
If you just call me

So just call on me brother, when you need a hand
We all need somebody to lean on
I just might have a problem that you'd understand
We all need somebody to lean on

Lean on me when you're not strong
And I'll be your friend
I'll help you carry on
For it won't be long
Till I'm gonna need
Somebody to lean on

**********************************

This is the msg tt i want to tell all my friends!! I LOVE U ALL!!! and u've always got a friend here to carry u on! =D

this song juz kept ringing in my mind a few days ago. i wanna tell u guys tt u can always count on me ya! i'll do my best to make myself available ya? it's the load i choose to carry on my own accord cos no matter wad, i'll be ur friend! =) what am i, ur friend for? so remember me!!! =D

started my day off with these four words which tore my heart:

the world is lost....

it made me wonder why am i in my comfort zone still not going out? there are pple out there who needs to noe Jesus. and this four words came to me again when i saw this 2 guys at service today. they are pple who juz came willingly when invited. they said they came cos they needed something to occupy them. their life was once empty but now, they're faithful in what they do and they're attending church regularly. with tt, i praise God!

so anyways, i juz want to end off, i'm ur friend no matter how much u hate me, i've nvr hated almost anyone. even if i did, i always pray God's blessings upon their lives. so ya... want to let all of u noe, i may sometimes be a jerk haha... useless, uncommited, unsensitive and not knowing my limits but, i'll nvr stop being a friend u can trust ya! =D

back to school tml!

I cant stand it!! i've got to blog this!

OH MY!!! WHY IS SHAN ON PERFECT 10!?!?!?!

ok... those of u who remember shan from eye for a guy 2??? the guy who nearly kissed denise!?

HE'S A LOSER!!! WHY HE TAKE OVER CARRIE'S show!?!?!?!?

haha... a caller juz called in and after asking the caller for his dedication, he accidentally cut himself off!!! oh my!! haha.. he made sucha big booboo!! hahahahahaha!!!! maybe tt's why he's on the late night show. hopefully no one's tuning in. haha...

guess he's inexperienced. he speaks monotonously... BORING!!!!

aww... no more carrie at night to put me to bed... haiz.... shan... of all pple.... he's playing wierd songs too... so not carrie... boo...

k... time to go to bed..

Finally! i get a break..

ha.. finally exams are over... dunnoe how i'd do. but thursday, i had my last paper, chemistry. (OMG!!! CARRIE'S NO MORE ON THE LATE NIGHT SHOW!!!) was juz tuning in.. dunnoe if i'm on the right channel or not.. haha.. today friday right!?!? no sat morn... ha.. WHY NO CARRIE!!! haha.. she's my ear candy.

ok back to wad i wanna say... gonna do fine for chem i think. hopefully too cos i need an A and 2 AO's.. haiz.. really hope i do well in chi too.. physic's like totally gone i think...

btw, there's not gonna be a miss how in MI no more.. aww... ha... leaving on mon.. dunnoe if it's her last day or, she's not coming at all.. arr.... gonna miss her man...

before anything pop into my mind, i want to say tt... I'VE WATCH FANTASTIC FOUR AND IT'S GREAT!! i like the invisible girl... cos she's sooo cheerfully cute! hahaha... the human torch's kinda a jerk haha... but he's real cool ya! arrogant too haha... yea... nice.. watched it after my chem paper with kelv and clinton. before tt, they came and wrecked my house. haha.. jkjk... wrecked the PS2!! hahaha....

it's like i din even realise tt before the show, i had a chem paper haha...

anyway, i had i real peaceful and slow going day today... had lots of sleep... soo holiday like.. haha... man... ok nvm.. shall talk about it in my next entry... ha.. if i remember. kk... nitez...

woah!~ truly a nice day!

haha.. i had a great day today man... besides that 3 hours of excruciating pain.. haha.. especially 10mins before the paper was ending.. it went by sooooo slowly... haha....

oh ya! haha... miss how's only 23!!! oh my! i thought she was 26 or something haha... i din noe tt la HOHO ('o') hahaha... getting excited juz for the sake of wanting to be excited hahaha.... btw, she's leaving on the 22nd of this month.... man.... gonna miss me eye candy.. haha...

ok so let's get to my day. started off with me not knowing what time the paper starts. thought it was in the morning. so i msged mo and sam. i was in the car when mo replied my msg he say 12 noon. so i was like should i get off the car?? haha.. i got off. and immediately when i got off, i recieved another msg. in my mind i was like "MO!! u trying to fool me is it!?!?!" den i opened the msg hoping tt my dad's car wouldn't scoot off...

it's sam. haha.. she also replied 12 noon. hahaha... so tt means i get to go home and maple!! yay! of course i studied for chem too la.

now i'm very good in my starting chapters of chem... hopefully i get a D or min an E for chem. muz continue studying le... going back to the book soon.

before typing this, i had one hell of a DOTA game hahaha... SA POWER!!! 30-2 wuahahahahaha!!! the comp juz kept going "OWNING!", "MONSTER KILL", "DOUBLE KILL" wuahahaha.. sounded soo cool hahahahaha.. i was owning all the other players. and i'm damn proud of them. first is cos, they did not quit on us. they continued playing even though they know they have lost. major gap in level man.. i felt bad la... i'm like lvl 25 and they're like 16 only... haha.. but i had lots of fun!! broke my old record of 14 kills. hahaha........ 30.... wow.... haha...

kk! back to the book!

lol... the time now is 911.. haha....

today's a nice day...

ah... muz be waking up to this song wonderful world that might have change my perception of life... my paper's starting in an hour and a half's time but i'm still at home, by the window looking out enjoying the wind and the scenery.. just start drifting off.... wishing i stayed by the sea...

the sun's out bright, not too strong and not too light. just bright. the clouds are like in the right place... really feel like taking a pic of it... it's sooo beautiful... the best part, it's sooo windy... nvr get to enjoy this wind too often now cos my door's always closed. secondly, during this time of day, i'd be in school...

hmmm.... but i guess i've really got to get going for my maths paper! wish me all the best! (like i even need it ha!)

just some thoughts..

how do i start...

hmmm.. ok, i think like wad luke chen say is right, i am falling slave to my laptop, it's been such a routine tt now, it's getting me hooked. i juz cant dun stay online. though it's juz staying online, i am studying but it is distracting... i come and look see, look see whenever i am bored of studying. ha...

my final wisdom tooth is coming out! how? it hurts quite bad especially juz now.. ar... i want to go remove but i cant bear spend my parent's money. also i am a lil afraid of the pain.... haiz.. a problem since young haha... to much bad memories of dentists...

juz now i was watching this show (in which i'm too lazy to describe wad happened and all) and it kinda made me think abt some things.. i wonder wad happen if we went seperate ways? as in my close friends... let's say church frens. like we nvr see each other till we're like 60+ maybe a widow or spinister by then... wierd... maybe it's someone u used to like but went seperate ways and u nvr see him/her again till u are retired in a home and by coincidence meet each other there.... man... bet it'll be quite nice... i'd be happy... but we're all old and all... single, dunnoe where's our children... haha... anyway, tt wont happen. so ya... haha..

den the 7 o'clock show. ruan mian mian.... haha.. she's such a sweet lady. haha... bao bei too. but abt ruan mian mian, she's got a unique name huh.. haha... especially when they use her name to describe themselves like soft like jelly, den they use her name haha... as i watch i cant help but laugh.. it's like so cute la. haha...

anyway, gotta get back to studying... bye!

woot!~ over with!

man.. i'm happy tt today's over with!! haha... chinese and physics. haha... so ya, thanks for ur prayers and support especially des and gracie! haha... think i'll do well cos God's holding y hands ya des! hahahaha... and ya, i will nvr win lottery gracie, sad to say... haha... cos i'll nvr buy 1! haha..

i believe tt i'm gonna do well for chinese haha.. cos i felt tt i did quite a good job on it. haha... but i dunnoe la.. juz feel tt way abt my compo. heh.. as for physics, i'm mentally prepared cos i did not study much for it, cos of my horrible sat and sun.. haiz... but it's ok, cos it's my fault tt i'm not working hard on it.

sooo, i'm glad tt exam's gonna be soon over.. but tt means.... miss how's gonna leave MI!!! aww.... tt's soooo sad... she's staying for night study today which really made me feel like staying haha... cos it's like the last time man... aww.... she's like the sweetest teacher in MI! haha... especially her smile. lol!! it's heavenly hahahaha....

but i need to go home and rest la... haha... i really need my home.. need to recuperate haha.. cant wake up this morning even though i had 6 hrs of sleep la! i woke up early to do my work but i juz keep falling asleep in front of my book.

btw, did i say tt miss how was the invidgilator (argh!! dunnoe how to spell... haha.) man.. so cool la! haha... get to see her as in really see her hahaha.... lol! bet miss lee go pao toh me! hahaha but nvm la... she's juz my eye candy. though, if i was her age, i'd go after her heh....

so like erm, i'm resting now... not doing anything much, planning my day for tml. haha...wanna make use of it properly... ya... sooo... ok tt's all i've gotta say.. haha.... awww... miss how.....

killer headache!

man.. i'm juz having this killer headache that is affecting my mood and my studies... i think it's cos of my excessive gaming and tt's why, i've made myself not to touch a single game today hahaha... hopefully, the whole of next week too...

hmmm... as in afecting my mood, it has made me really sleepy, i juz dun feel like talking and doing anything.. haha... it's sooo uncomfortable. but now, i'm feeling better le!! =D

ok... so today was supposed to be set aside to study my physics but i guess i've given up. however now, i am planning to go for it again! yea!! haha.. but first, chem assignments! ar... suppose to do it in church but i did not bring the questions along. so silly haha....

after evening, i was thinking about going for dinner or go home.. really wanted to go with the rest to have some fun before my 1 week of pain comes. but it suddenly juz came to me tt in all things, praise the Lord. so went to tell des tt i was going home. something juz kept telling me tt i should obey my mom... so ya, i did... =)

was super hngry on the way home... din take my lunch... once again, i din realise i did not take lunch. ha.... so my sis, (of all pple at home) cooked my favourite cambell's chunky!!! mmmmm-MMM!! haha...

so, guess tt's all for my day ya.. really hope the headache goes away tml... gonna sleep early tonight. haha... see u guys tml and all the best for ur papers!!!

Wonderful World

dunnoe why but this song somehow juz keeps ringing through my head... having a headache now so cant really focus on my work... so decided to change my blog song... haha..

haha... nice, short and sweet song....

enjoy!

Finally!!! oral's over!!!

haha.. my A level oral's finally over!!! yay!!!

no i'm juz left with... my chinese mid yr, physics, maths and chem... ya... tt's all left... hahaha....

man... chinese oral was really funny la!! i wasn't the least nervous but excited to get it over with!! haha.. din really matter what marks i get.. but juz want to get it over with lor.. haha.. i was itching on my sit. cant wait for my turn. when my turn came, man.. i got up and chiong in hahaha...

like i sadi, wasnt scared or what, but, when it came to convesation, i totally forgot how to speak chinese!!! haha... the teacher translated everything for me!!! haha... and when i'm stumped by her question, it becomes like some 5 second silence period where i smile at u and u smile at me.... -_-"

den it's like i barely spoke.. haha.. juz went "erm.... erm... erm, erm, ya...." haha... tt's all... haha....

-juz something i thought about... i realise the word pon is getting old in 04S3 with the new word introduced by saw and kai --- AWOL! hahaha... (absent without official leave)

So far till now..

so far till now, there are lots of thing i need to say haha...

first, i'm most probably screwed for my project work... cos there's such a sport as underwater rugby!!! arh... ha... doomed!

den for these few days, i realised tt sitting alone gives me lots of thinking space and helps me in my studies... definitely aint influenced by the fact tt everyone's sleeping around me... haha.. so i'm awake, studying, and not caught up in the small chats. haha... cool right. however, things changed.. i may not be sitting alone already... guess, mr chen moved things back.

ha.. i guess, i kinda like the feeling of being lonely again... haha.. wierd right? but it's comforting to me..

one last thing i wanna leave for most pple and probably pple from S3

Do not take kindness for granted.

it's something i definitely do appreciate but wad i see in class, pple are juz taking advantage of it... so.. next time, when a friend is trying to be nice or a teacher, DUN PUSH IT!

just a gentle reminder la... heh...

yea.. ha... i guess tt's all i feel like saying... so ya.. ha... take care ppl!

i juz cant sleep...

guess i really cant sleep eh... i juz feel all wierd inside... wanna forget everything ya, juz play rugby... but at this point of time? guess not...

i am juz thinking about the day, since before my birthday till today, and how much of a jerk i have been... man... really a jerk...

still trying to keep in touch with God, even up till now... but how i feel, really make me wanna juz be alone... but another part, makes me feel tt i juz wanna be with God... guess i'm juz stuck in between ya....

i'm juz running through all my memories... thinking of everything tt juz passes by... i feel dumb and silly ha... at the same time, i guess i realise how childish i can be...

but 2 words to you i really wanna say...

I'm sorry...

=) i dunnoe why i've acted tt way.
juz wanna stop and start from the time tt msg was sent.

(the last thing i did which ever put a smile on ur face.
or the rose i made and to you, in which i gave.)

where it all began,
you became, --- my beloved friend..........

i'm so sorry, but if we could start again,
all i want is to be ur friend.
nothing more, just as it was,
i am sincere and full of remorse.

nothing i do would ever change things now,
really wished if i only knew how.
i already know what i want to do,
just to be ur friend, --- i assure you...

hmmm... life's just like that.. ha!

hahaha... i guess, life's juz something really special ya... comes and goes... pple entering, pple leaving, had ur fun time, now's ur pain. hahahaha.... gonna hafta work hard to get rid of every load tt i have caused... ha... many things.... MANY!

studies, friends, committments, rugby.

have started anew since school reopen, but starting to fall back a lil.. definitely need God by my side now... guess game's getting the better of me... haiz... haha... but i noe i'm doing juz fine! GP's going great. now's wad i'll get for paper 2 haha...

chem, i more less am starting to understand things. juz have to start chionging physics like crazy once tml starts... ha.... physic's on monday... i think it's the crazy 3 hr paper!! =.= i dun need TT much time... heh...

so ya... others, like the touch rug team i feel like forming, gonna try to make by this sat, if not really, it would have to be after mid years... haha... i really feel like juz playing touch now... do lots of sprinting.. would definitely pump up my stamina for contact. gonna work harder this year man... see a future in our back line. as for forwards, aint doin too bad ya!

haiz... guess, i wanna go spend some time with God after typing this and bathing... so ya... pple, i wish yer all the best in wad ever u are doing and going through in life. take care!

just another great day i guess...

ha... today, is juz a great day, cos i guess, it's a nice break from my normal 1 week routine. no monday, no long day... haha... no chem pract. no Nothing! haha...

din really spend much time studying.. much of it, i fell asleep while studying halfway.. enjoyed the long afternoon.

after tt, went down to cck for a movie. war of the worlds. ha... nice show, thrilling and all, but wierd ending haha... nice show. yea....

haha... what i feel inside now, haha... lost. juz feel like playing touch rug... juz sprint up, down, up, down, score try, turn around, start all over again. haha... come to think of it, i've got to think of another move, haha.. my trademark aint fooling any of our team members no more.... haha... not fun.

ending off, i shall think of another trademark move!

hmmm.. not a bad day after all. =D

ha.. yea... the day passed really fast today. cos service is at 3pm today la... usually, after morning service we have like 4 hrs, hang out, do work, study. but this time, wah... after service is like end of evening service hahaha....

went down to bukit timah for food. hmmm... long time since i've been there.

definitely enjoy the companionship of es, angel and des. ha...

sooo... on my way back i saw kira's chio bu teacher haha... the bowling one. NOT miss wu. i repeat NOT miss wu!!! hahaha.... forgot her name but her bf, fiance, husband ( i not sure who he is but she was holding his hand ) .... dunnoe wad to say. hahahahaha.... i am mean la... but really no taste!!! hahahaha... maybe he has a cool and nice character la. haha... but it was shocking to see her on the LRT.

couldn't recognise her at first, cos she was smiling ear, to ear. hahaha.. -_- eerie hahahaha..

haiz... am really sleepy now... can fall asleep any time man... soo ya.. nitez pple... God bless... =)

only a week..

haha.. only a week but i missed you guys man!! haha... in the morning wanted to go for the thing la, but i woke up really late haha... nvm.. next week, hopefully, can get to play touch if i get enough pple.

actually, wanted to go out early... dunnoe leh... juz go out, cos i miss everyone!! (church pple) hahahaha... i juz love hanging out with them, though sometimes i'm really out of frequency. ha... school friends are like abt same frequency ya, but hard to hang out ya. haha.. next week. i will be there for almost all night studies. so can really hang out le!! so u guys better stay back hor!

haha... juz love playing a fool in school. hahaha... so fun. disturb tt group of ah lians!!! hahaha... favourite hang out, --- my classroom outside the girls toilet!

den got grace and leney! haha... extremely screechy but cool to chat with.. haha.. whiney too! =P

den there's vick and rach. hahahaha... stupid pple. always bluffing me. den of course S2 pple la!! haha...

zhi wei, ah wei, and kira too. other than tt, S3 pple le lor. haha... dunnoe wad i'm typing too hahahaha! juz for fun. bored la... heh...

sooo ya... waiting for the 1 week cycle to start all over again. except, each week gets better, as God moves through! heh... see u guys soon!

bored, bored, BORED!

haha... really bored man... wanna study but dun really feel like.. dunnoe wad to do... not much pple online to chat with... tv has nothing much nice, maple is over crowded... zzzz.. haha...

juz have to go back to studying... haiz....

hahaha... guess, i'm gonna clear my msg box which now contains approximately 400 sms' haha.... cant bear to clear them though... dates all the way back to before my birthday... ha.. history...

k... guess, i'll go find something to do.. so seeya peeps!

wa.. tired arz...

ha... today's quite a nice day la overall haha... got to do some chem practice which i still suck at it la... haiz... need to work harder..

soo... rugby training was great, except my 2 old knee and ankle injury are having probs.. especially ankle... but i had lots of fun playing touch la! haha... wanted to do some bastarding but failed la haha... nearly score man.... nvm... dun wan to tok about such sensitive issues hahaha...

oh ya... hahah han chin!!! haha... major killer man... i dunnoe but something happened to my vein. when i hit his tackle shield, wah.. arm cannot move ar!!! kena vein! den little finger paralysed.. but after a while ok le.... haha... stupid sia...

haiz... nothing much to type le.. except i need to get my sleep... man.. my body's giving off a lot of heat. and i mean ALOT!!! soo uncomfortable... my head burning up... today hot day for training ar...

ok.. gonna remove the previous entry cos it's affecting the feng shui of my blog haha...soo ya... see u guys soon!